Sunday, August 31, 2008

Swades

Ye jo des hai tera, swades hai tera, tujhe hai pukaara
Ye woh bandhan hai jo kabhi toot nahin sakta

Tujhse zindagi, hai ye keh rahi
Sab toh paa liya, ab hai kya kami
Yun toh saare sukh hai barse
Par door tu hai apne gharse
Aa laut chal tu ab diwaane
Jahaan koyi toh tujhe apna maane
Awaaz de tujhe bulaane, wahi des
Ye jo des hai tera, swades hai tera, tujhe hai pukaara
Ye woh bandhan hai jo kabhi toot nahin sakta
Sounds quite romantic and filmi but somehow, since the day we have returned to India for good, I have this song stuck in my head. Wierd isn't it? Coz part of me still does not believe that I have closed shop and moved lock stock and barrel from US to India for good. And part of me knows that there is no running away from the truth and maybe it is my heart trying to tell my brain that we have made the best decision for ourselves and our families...maybe it is me trying to see the emotional side of things rather than the materialistic side. Who knows why this song bug - all I know is that this is it and there is no going back. We are not on a vacation here in India...we are here for better or for worse...we are here for each other...not just via a phone call but physically here.

And maybe that is why unlike all the other times when I used to visit India, I am in no hurry at all to call all my cousins or friends who live here and catch up with them. Coz its not like I have limited vacation days...now I am here for good. So there is plenty of time for me to call and catch up. Its quite a mixed set of emotions really...like I said, part of me does not believe that we have actually made it happen. And the other part of me knows that it is done and that is why I am in no hurry to reach out and call everyone I know here coz I know that will unfold in its own sweet time. For now, I just want to live in this surreal world that we are in...mentally and physically in all homes...the one I left behind, the ones I am living in and the one we will create for ourselves.

4 comments:

Jyoti said...

Hey, I added you to my list of blogs I frequently visit. When I first saw Swades, this song brought tears to my eyes! Someday I would like to come back to my des.

Divs said...

Hugs to you Jyo. Yes pls do come back so that our kids can grow up together like we did too :-) BTW I have added you to my blog list too.

Sindhu said...

Hey, it's nice to find someone who has finally returned to India! I'd like to add you to my blogroll if you don't mind. We ourselves have plans of moving back, and from reading your posts, I feel we'll be going through these exact same motions a few years down the road. Good luck!

Divs said...

Sindu - sure pls go ahead and add me to your blogroll. Good to know you are thinking of coming back too. I will keep posting my experiences of returning to India after a decade abroad.