My Best Mother's Day Ever

So I left a huge chunk of my heart back in Bangalore recently when I had to travel on a business related trip and leave my baby behind. This was on the Friday just before the Mother's Day weekend. I had to be away for 2 nights and was scheduled to be back on Sunday morning which coincidentally hapenned to be Mother's Day.

Obviously, since I had never left my baby away from me overnight, I was going away with a heavy heart. But hubby and I decided to make the farewell quick and not drag it too much since she had already sensed something was up since a day before. Kids...they surely do have a sixth sense. N had started saying "Mamma tata" to me since the night before! So I went ahead and actually had this conversation with her:
Me: Where is mamma going?
N: Office
Me: What does N want from mamma's office?
N: Chocolate :-)

Who can then resist the urge to bring back tonnes of chocolates for the dear little baby who actually was such a nice girl while I was away that she did not give even one reason for daddy to complain! But the mommy in me decided its best to steer away from forming such habits (that too decided with a loaded heart). So I chose to bring her back some new toys to play with. Nice thinking huh :-)

Nyways, back to my Mother's Day story. So I do my work in Pune, spend nice quality time with my brother there and then fly back to Bangalore on Sunday morning (May 10, 2009). I make sure we wish both - my mom and my mom-in-law for their special day. But all this while, it completely slipped my mind that now I am a mom too and I too now have someone to wish me on this day when she grows a little older. Little did I know that my dear hubby and daughter have already planned a cute surprise for me back home. So I catch the Volvo from the airport to our home, walk the remaining 20 minutes dragging my luggage...making sure not to trouble my little child and hubby to get dressed, get the car out and drive - all for saving me a good walk that I am sure I need after such an appetising meal served in Kingfisher Air. Finally reach home panting and sweating in the summer heat, cursing all the stuff I carried in the backpack, promising to travel empty handed if possible next time and such. But all that exhaustion vanished when my daughter and hubby greeted me at the door with this conversation:
Hubby: N, what do you say to mamma?
N (shying away slightly but instantly announcing): I (read - aaaaaiiiiiieeeee) du du! (Meaning: I love you!)
Hubby: (with a group hug) Happy Mother's Day!

It just melted my heart! Teaching N to say "I love you" to greet me was probably the best mother's day gift I could ever get from both - my hubby and my dear daughter who has such an endearing way to say every new thing she learns. I actually really hope she doesn't outgrow this "I du du" way of saying "I love you"...coz when she does say it correctly, I will know that my baby will have suddenly grown up into a big girl!

Teaching her these 3 magic words shows me how thoughtful you are not just as a father but as a dear husband to me too. If you do read this, dear hubby, I want you to know that this mother's day was my best ever not just coz you taught her this but also coz you took such good care of her and yourself while I was away that I did not have a single reason to worry about anything at home. I love you dear hubby for being such a strong pillar of support for me...for always being by my side...for being the reason why I am so happy in my life inspite of all the ups and downs it brings us.

Here's wishing all you readers a belated Happy Mother's Day. Please do fill us in on how you spent yours or what touched you the most on this day.

Happy 20th month my little one

As you can see by the Lilypie ticker on the right, my little angel turned 20 months old today. Strange feeling calling it 'old' when they are still such new 'young' little bundles of joy. I have yet to see soooo many of her firsts in life and yet there are sooooo many firsts that she has learnt to master already. Can't stop marvelling at how quickly time has flown by...when it just seems like yesterday when we drove our little precious home from the hospital in Fremont. I remember my hubby's words to me on that short drive home - "its just the two of us now (he meant - to take care of little N)". And I remember it drizzling lightly and me fussing over how the car seat should cover her completely eslt what if she has a little water on her!!!???? :-) And look at her now - completely a water baby! Loves it like crazy. Swims with me not just in the baby pool but the adult 5 ft. deep one as well. Shrieks in delight as soon as I leave her floating in the pool with just her arm bands on for support.

She sure has come a long way. From not being able to talk at all for almost 14 months to having a huge vocabulary all of a sudden and having this great ability to comprehend not one, not two but three languages already! Konkani, Hindi and English! She has gotten into the habit of forming sentences now - which ofcourse consist of just 2 words but atleast she has understood the power of being able to get her message across by combining 2 words. The most important ones being - "Mamma chocolate" :-) Others in her vocabulary are "Mamma come" or "Papa come" or "Aabu come"etc. - you get the idea.

She has also done quite well in her potty training so far and our latest struggle is trying to brush her teeth. Her allowing us the privilige to brush her teeth entirely depends on how good we are at convincing her with stories about bugs or ants in her teeth on a given day. She sure has a strong will - when she does not want something she will make sure she has her way. That part is definitely from her dad's genes, I'm sure :-) Also the need to hold my hair when she's sleepy or hungry or just plain playful. Ugh - that one I am determined to bring to an end soon. From her mom's genes, she has inherited the love for water and the need to have mommy around her all the time. My own mom tells me how I would cling to her all day and howl when she even just stepped away to use the restroom! Man - how did our parents handle us? And not just one but two little mosnters? Gosh!

That reminds me - do any of you who've had babies around mid 2007 plan to have a second one soon? (Or already have a second one enroute). If so, please please share it here...I am quite curious as to what the thinking is about the ideal age gap between siblings.

In the meantime, here's to my little N who is still the only baby of the house - both on mommy and daddy's side of the family. Hope blogger.com is still around when she grows up and reads these letters from mamma with love.

Beauty regimen of a mommy

Was browsing a magazine online and reading this article when it struck me that my beauty regimen or rather skin TLC is actually next to NOTHING. Ever since I became a mom, my daily beauty regimen is to moisturize, moisturize and moisturize. And that's pretty much it. Obviously I do regular visits to the parlor just to make sure I don't grow hairy bushes all over my face ;) and once in a while when I look really really old with shiny grey hair, I decide to actually find the time to color my mane using one of those do it yourself boxes at home. But other than that, really nothing.

Isn't that scary? Atleast I thought it was quite scary when I glanced into the elevator mirror the other day just casually but what actually caught my eye for the first time were new lines under my eyes when I smiled!!! Yikes! I never had an eye for such things ever and thought that all women who obsess over such things are vain. So you can only imagine how obvious it must be for a woman like me to notice such a thing! And I am only in my very very early thirties! Help!!!!!!!!!!!

Please new mommies - do fill me in on what your beauty regimen is. And more than anything, how do you find the time to get things like facials etc. done? I mean when I was actually a working mom, I had a full time nanny to look after my little N so I could sneak out time here an there for an occassional pedicure or facial etc. But now that I am at working from home full time, who do I leave the baby with for such things? Weekends fly by just running errands - so when do you stay-at-home or working-from-home moms manage to take out time for beauty regimens?

My baby turned 18 months a month ago!

And I have been meaning to write this post since then! Just haven't gotten around to finally doing it :(

Anyways, here I am...finally trying to capture all that has been going on since she turned 1.5 years old (on Feb 25, 2009). We left for a 10 day road trip on March 1 for my hubby's grandma's first shraadh and also N's mundan ceremony. The plan was for hubby's parents and sis to drive down from Bombay and us from Bangalore to meet at Sirsi. Stay there for a night at his cousin's and then drive together to Kodkani for the shraadh. But I fell ill with a bad case of cold, fever etc. a day earlier so instead of leaving on Sat (Feb 28), we left on Sun morning (Mar 1). So that gave us very little time with the cousins in Sirsi. Anyways, we all met up and reached Kodkani on Sat night in time for the shradh the next day. The village stay was quite an enjoyable experience with the entire "kunj" getting together - the first for me after my marraige ofcourse. On Tuesday afternoon we left for Ankola where the mundan ceremony was supposed to be done. Stayed in the kuldevta temple that night and N had a blast running around the huge temple premises. Then on the morning of Wednesday, March 4 - the five of us took little N with a very worried heart for her mundan. I was mostly worried about how much she would cry and what if she shook her head in all the crying and hurt herself. Gosh - all sorts of horrible thoughts kept worrying me the previous night. But God had a miracle in store for us. Somehow, N cried a lot the previous night in her sleep (maybe night terrors) but sat very calm and still through her entire mundan! She surprised us all by not moving an inch all the while the guy shaved her head. She knew something was going on on her head but did not dare move as she sat in her dad's arms. Whew! Thank God! With that gone smoothly, the next on our agenda was to hit the Murdeshwar beach and actually have a vacation. But for some unplanned reasons (such as the driver's time limitations etc.) we had to cut short our trip by 2 days and think of alternatives on how to best spend the limited time we had left. So we decided to check out the nearby Gokaran beach and Shivji temple instead. We stayed on at Ankola that night and left for Gokaran on Thursday. Enjoyed the temple visits and the beach and drove back to Sirsi. Stayed with the cousins that night and the next morning, his folks left for Bombay and we drove back to Bangalore. All in all - a very nice enjoyable trip with lots of quality time with the in-laws family.

And this is why I never actually got around to doing an 18 month post for my little one. She did have a huge milestone of having her mundan done at this age and her mommy and daddy are so proud of her having sat through it without any trouble at all.

The other milestone I had planned for her at this age was to start her potty training and stop her diapers - cold turkey. I stuck to my plan and the next morning after our arrival back home, I told her how we left her diapers at Ankola :-) It took her almost a week to get it but she finally did do her first poop in the potty the following Friday. So we started training her on Sat (Mar 7) and she finally got the idea on Fri (Mar 13). And I must give a lot of credit to her dad who supported and helped me a lot in all this messy business of potty training all week and it was actually him who got the pleasure of witnessing her go poo-poo in the potty for the first time on Friday afternoon. Mommy was running some errands in the market at the time. By now she has started telling us when she wants to go poo and we take her to the potty to do it. But she still hasn't gotten the idea of sensing when she needs to go pee so cannot tell us beforehand. Any of you experienced moms have any ideas on how to teach them this soon?

Now that she is almost 19 months, Little N is also trying to drink milk from a cup atleast once a day. Mommy mixes doctor recommended chocolate flavored Kids Pro in a glass of milk and offers it from a cup. N has it either from a straw or spoon or directly from the cup or sometimes a combination of all of the above. But atleast she is trying :-) My dear sweetie....how fast you have grown and oh how much you talk and absorb everything these days. It amazes me at how you observe all the little things and try to tell us all that you see. Oh and it is so cute that only I understand what you try to tell me coz isn't it me who taught you all this in the first place. That is such a satisfying feeling...to see your child reciprocate and demonstrate all that he learnt and absorbed from you and the world you are building around him. It won't be long before we parents will not be the biggest influence in their lives...infact we will probably be the least important quite soon :-)

Daycare Centers and Preschools in Koramangala, Bangalore

So I have now officially joined the bandwagon of "paranoid moms" - not just being paranoid about daycares and preschools myself but spreading this fever to all the friends around me who are moms to kids in a similar age group as mine! Ain't I so evil ;) heeheehee

Nyways, it all started with a job interview I was actively pursuing. And the decision of whether I should take up the job if offered weighed largely on whether I would be able to find a very good home away from home for little N. In the US, I was able to work without much guilt coz I had a wonderful nanny who loved N just like she was her own child. But here, I am yet to find either a nanny or a daycare who will give her the love, warmth, intellectual stimulation and hygeine all at the same time. So over the past few weeks, I have been spending a lot of time each day researching and visiting daycare centers and preschools around our neighborhood in Bangalore. Hauling a toddler around to each facility is in itself a huge pain - forget coming home, thinking, comparing and racking my brain to figure out what is good or bad about each place and what are the options my kiddo has. So I thought I'd do this in written so that it gives me some clarity and also help out some of you who might be looking for this information out there.

This analysis is purely my opinion based on my personal research and talking to a lot of folks whose kids go to many of these places listed here.

I have finally begun to understand a little bit about the early years educational system here. Figured out that Daycare is a term given to something like babysitting where your kid is basically in their care, being fed and kind of hangs out in the premises but not necessarily with a structured routine. Pre-School is more of a structured program where they have an hour of two of instructor led activities. Pre-school (also called Playschool) starts at age 1 year 10 months at most places. When the kid turns 2.5 years old, you have more options for him/her. You can continue to keep them in the pre-school or opt for a Montessori. Montessoris generally accept kids at the age of 2.5 and continue their education upto 6 years of age. So your kid can either be in a pre-school (which is the traditional Playgroup, Nursery, LKG, UKG) or a Montessori upto the age of 6. Or you can pull him out of either and admit him to a high school (which offers education upto grade 10 or 12) for LKG at around 4.5 years of age. You can pretty much do this from a Pre-school to a regular school whenever you prefer (LKG or UKG or 1st standard) but Montessoris generally recommend children to stay on for atleast 3 years to obtain the full benefits of the Montessori method. And some believe that research has proven that kids who went through the Montessori program in their early years have grown up to be smarter.

Anyways, so here is a listing of all the daycares, pre-schools and montessoris I have visited, heard of or done some research on in Koramangala, Bangalore. Hope this helps atleast some of you who are looking for such consolidated information online.

1. Little Elly - This was the first ever place I visited so was not quite sure what questions to ask and what to look for etc. But after talking to the management there, I was pretty satisfied with the way they did things around there. The only thing that bothered me was that their toddler program (which is what my N would have gone to then) was only for 2 hours each day. I was really looking for a place that would keep them for 3-4 hours so that they can bond, socialize and get a feel of spending a good amount of time away from mommy. That way I could ease her into a full time program if I wanted to start working soon. Other than that, I liked their facilities, teachers and the overall hygiene.

• Pros: They do have daycare facilities after the child's school is done. So after 9-11am, the child can still stay there upto 6:30pm (daycare charges extra). Huge plus for working parents.
• Cons: If all you want is a playschool, they only run it for 2 hours per day. Paying around 30K for 2 hours per day seems a bit too much.
  

2. Child-Care Montessori - This place has been running its Montessori Pre School in 5th Block Koramangala for over a year and had recently opened up their Day Care center in 3rd block, Koramangala which is much closer to our place. So it sounded great since it is a Montessori cum Daycare center which means they accept children as young as 3 months of age. Obviously at that age, they would be treated as daycare children but if they continue there for a while, they will automatically be registered for the Montessori education program at 2.5 years of age.

• Pros: I visited only their Day Care center which I really liked. They have very clean premises (great hygeine ranks very high in my list) and have good equipment overall for infants - such as good quality cribs, toddler beds, toys (indoor and outdoor). I also loved the folks running this place, their thoughts and philosophy.
  
• Cons: I did not really like that my child at 1.8 years of age will be hanging out at the daycare center which was still so new that it did not really have a lot of other kids her age to socialize with. It also did not have a structured routine as such for this age group so was more like a daycare where they would pretty much do what they feel like and hang out with a maid most of the time. If I was working fulltime though, this might be a decent place to leave my kid for the time being.
  

3. KinderKare - This is primarily a home based day care which accepts kids around 2 years of age. They have a 3 hour program for these toddlers and they heavily encourage free play.

• Pros: I liked the fact that they have a total of around 30 kids total in the age group from 2 to 4.5 years of age. All of these kids spend most of their time together so it is more like a montessori environment with some structure. I loved the 2 ladies who run this place and their overall attitude of doing it more for a passion than making money in the business. They seemed very understanding and flexible to accomodate these little ones totally understanding that they are not used to a routine of any kind yet since this is their first school ever. I think they will be ideal for my little N's first school and ideal for me as well since this is a stone's throw away from my place. So no putting her in a car seat and driving her to school every morning. All I have to do is enjoy a nice 5 minute walk.
• Cons: They only offer a 3 hour program and do not have a full day daycare offering. So not an ideal place for working parents.
  

4. Vilma's Daycare - This is small cozy little daycare run by a nice lady who runs it in a home (does not necessarily live there though). They accept infants as young as 3 months as well and have a few teachers for the toddlers. I was not too keen on this place as it did not seem big enough for me (all the kids hung out in one living room for play time, meal time, reading time etc.) They said they spend an hour outdoors each day in a nearby park. But as I mentioned earlier, I have a high hygeine standard and this place did not fare too well for me in that department.

5. Planet Kids - Great huge premises. I should say by far the best I have seen in Koramangala. They have a huge place with all sorts of outdoor activities including things such as a splash pool. Indoors, they have a huge ball pit, a media room (with a huge flat screen TV) and a computer lab as well! So facilities wise the place ranked # 1 in my rating but I was not too impressed by their management and their overall attitude.

• Pros: Great campus. Have various locations in Bangalore so you can transfer your child to a nearby location if you move. Also have full time daycare facilities for working parents.
  
• Cons: Management did not show too much understanding and flexibility for kids who are going to a school for the first time ever. I am also not a huge fan of putting kids in front of a TV or computer as at this young an age.
  

6. Little Paradise - Is a preschool as well as daycare center.

• Pros: Offers day care facilities so is a plus for working parents.
• Cons: Heavily overcrowded. The daycare area is not seperate so infants sleeping are surrounded by playing toddlers all around.
  

7. Little Feat Montessori House of Children - I have personally not visited this facility since they do not accept kids younger than 2.5 years of age. But from all that I have heard and researched, this Montessori has nothing but good reviews all around. I have a lot of friends whose kids go there and have only heard good things about the people who run this place and the overall reputation, their attitude towards kids, etc. The only con I have heard is that they have 10 classes running but their facilities are not very huge both for indoor and outdoor play.

8. Head Start Montessori House of Children - I have not visited this facility either since they too do not accept kids younger than 2.5 years of age. But again, this place has great reviews from all that I have read about it. The only thing is that getting an admission here is next to impossible - they fill up with siblings of existing kids one or more years in advance!

9. Eurokids - Not visited this school either but have friends whose kids go here and are extremely happy about the place, teachers and curriculum. The big pro is that they have presence all over India so if you move around a lot, this is certainly beneficial for you.

10. Vivaa International - Not visited this place myself but have a few friends whose kids go there. Have heard mixed reviews about this place about their management of kids. The pro is that they are a Montessori which offers day care facilities as well so your kid can either spend the day here if you are working or go here after school for the remainder of the day.

11. Roots to Wings -This is a new chain of pre-schools owned and run by the Singapore based company Educomp. I was very interested in this since they claim to be very different from the rest in their philosophy and curriculum so thought why not check it out.

• Pros: The pro I liked was that they do accept kids at a very young age (around 1.5 years). And since they are so new, they do offer trial weeks where you can send the kids for 2 weeks free of charge to see if they really like it.
• Cons: The biggest con for me was that they were too new (no kids enrolled in the center that just opened up in Koramangala). So although they seemed to have all the knowledge in theory, I would feel more comfortable if I had seen them actually working with kids in real life. They were great at showing their powerpoint presentations about their well researched curriculum and the "seven petal approach" but when it came to practical questions from a mom such as how will you potty train my kid...they were not able to put me at ease (obviously coz they had never done it before!)
  

12. Planet Bloomingdale - Not visited this place myself since I had not heard any good reviews about it but I do know that they have a full time daycare for infants.