Of Graduation Days and Emotions

So during the week of organizing International Women's Day event and taking ownership to lead the Women's Diversity Group at work, there was yet another day when I was doing some kind of hosting, addressing the crowd and generally glowing in 2 two seconds of fame :-)

You remember I wrote about N's first school in life a while ago and how I loved it? Infact I think I wrote several posts on her at that school (check here and here). Well, they called me to *ahem ahem* be the chief guest at their graduation and annual day this year. I was shocked to say the least since this has never ever happenned to me before. I mean chief guest!!? Really? Am I that old or distinguished enough? Or am I famous or well connected enough? They surely have mistaken me for someone else I thought. Or maybe they couldn't rope in anyone on their A list and so I was their fall back option. So I tried telling them they should get a more influential person and what not but they wouldn't budge. They wanted it to be a parent, someone who knows the school more closely and thought I would be best since I had always supported them over the last couple of years.

So there I was! Supposed to come up with a speech, address the crowd, watch the cute little babies perform on stage and hand over graduation certificates to the cute little ones. I was touched. Ofcourse I wanted to do it. So I thought and thought about what I could tell these parents, grandparents and relatives who will be attending that day and most of whom I was sure would be older and wiser than me. Did some research online...just looking for graduation day ideas and came across this beautiful song that inspired me to pen all my thoughts down.

I decided that THIS was going to be my key message. I took inspiration from Sheryl Sandberg's video that I posted here since I was to give a talk without looking at any powerpoint slides out here. There would be no fancy conference room or a laptop going through my slide deck or anything. So I had to say what I had to say as if coming to me naturally and fill it with real life incidents. And I thought Sandberg did a great job at that in the video. Not easy for me to do this after spending years and years in the corporate world doing presentations with the aid of slides, notes or powerpoint decks. Kinda reminded me of school days when we would "by-heart" our poems or speeches and have to narrate :-) What would life be without technology....sigh!

Anyways, I digress. So I wrote and wrote till I poured my heart out on paper (well...electronic paper I must say) and decided that I'd end my talk with this above mentioned song. I'd let them listen to how beautifully it describes what I was trying to say and let their eyes moisten up too like mine did when I first heard it.

But then there came another contestant. A song that I have always, always loved and has never failed to make me teary eyed. A song that is sooooooo appropriate for a parent to sing for his/her child....that talks about our aspirations, hopes and prayers for our children. A song I have always wanted to sing for my daughter.

Sigh...not just the words but the picturization is also sooooo touching. Tough choice I tell you. I played both these songs for my little N over the week, slept on it, tried to reach a decision on which one I should tailor my talk towards and which one should be the conclusion of my talk. Finally after a lot of listening to these over and over again....on my laptop...on my ipod...in my sleep even...I decided I'd stick with the former...the song that started it all. After all that was the song that got me started on my writing and helped me put together a very nice message for the audience.

So that's what I did on the morning of March 12. I got up bright and early, got ready, kissed my lovely daughter and hubby goodbye (they had plans to spend a nice lazy, cozy Saturday morning at home) and took the ipod and ipod dock to Kinder Kare Playschool and immersed myself in the children. I had such a good time watching them perform without the anxiety of waiting for my little one to come on stage and worrying whether she would look at me and cry or dance! I was amazed to see that not a single one cried this year unlike last year when my lil N was doing the performance on that same stage but burst into tears when she was being handed over the graduation certificate. Too emotional I tell ya! They then welcomed me, said some really nice words about me and a small girl maybe 3.5 years old welcomed me with a lovely bouquet. It was such a pleasure spending the morning with them very unlike how I spent my own daughter's graduation day this year at the other Montessori she is going to. That was a nail biting, tear wiping, stressful event and is probably matter for another post in itself. After spending months practicing her dances at school, the little child was in tears when she was finally put on the stage on their Annual Day. And I don't really blame her coz the kids were taken to a totally different venue, a brand new place and room, a brand new stage where they have never been before and asked to perform. With NO prior mental preparation whatsoever. How would you expect a 3 or 4 year old to do something as humongous without any mental preparation whatsoever? This same child of mine performed much better last year when she was at here at Kinder Kare though she was 1 whole year younger! It is all about preparing and conditioning these little ones I say. Anyways, many other small things that could have been paid more attention to. But that was just Annual Day. There are other good things that this Montessori is doing very well which is why I am happy she is going there for another year.

Overall, this one incident of me going back to her previous school made me think how much I miss staying connected with her school. If I were in the US, I swear I would be so much more involved with her school. It is so normal and kind of expected for parents to stay involved in running the co-operative schools there in the US. I mean everything including volunteering to coach football (or any other sport) or leading a committee to organize other co-curricular activities, etc. Whereas in India, in most schools, parent involvement is neither offered nor encouraged. Pretty sad isn't it? What do you think?

School Season Again

It is school season again in this part of the world. And parents like me who have kids going to playschools or Montessoris are in the market for the next school their child should go to. Which means any parent I talk to, this is the topic of prime concern and one that we dwell on. Sometimes it feels like I just need something to obsess about in life - it is one thing to the other. Currently it is schools and what method of education is best for my child. Our hubbys' may call us 'paranoid moms' but trust me - all this 'market research' (translate: talking to every parent about it until they are ready to walk off the place) has helped me come to one decision atleast. That we will NOT be targeting schools which have a pure academic bend and focus only on marks rather than an all round development of the child respecting his interests in life. Which means we are taking the bold step of leaving out NPS (the most sought after school in most parent's list on our side of the town) from our list of schools we will apply to. Which is a HUGE step for a person like me who basically finds it so hard to make decisions (you can blame my Gemini genes I guess). My strategy in life otherwise is to shoot in all directions (translate: apply to all schools where the child will be eligible for age-wise) and once you do have a few admissions, think hard (translate: chew my hubby's and others' brains harder) and research a lot more (translate: read and re-read all the same websites and online forums and reviews again) and then make a call. Sigh!

So like I was saying - we have made a decision to leave out NPS from our list. But knowing me, I know the moment I hear that they are issuing forms, you will find me standing (and sweating like a pig) in the loooooooooong queues outside not 1, not 2 but all 3 branches of NPS near our area really hoping that I get the form! That's me. I know myself very well that way. Hubby calls it madness but so be it - I don't want to be left out of the collective madness (afterall the tonnes of other folks standing in line cannot be all mad). And what if my child does not get through allllllllllllllll the other schools we will be trying for and what if this is the only one left? Hubby says in that case we let her continue at the lovely Montessori she is going to now and try again for LKG next year. No big deal. And I actually agree. She and us parents loooooooooooove this Montessori she is going to at present and breaks my heart to have to pull her out of it in 1 year since she is not only enjoying it but learning so much there without any input from our end! She is just 3 and is already recognizing so many alphabets and numbers and is even writing some of them at times. Amazing really. But the sad thing is I don't have the courage to let her continue there and only worry about admissions when she is ready to go into 1st std. I wish I really had that courage and determination coz she has everything she needs here including daycare facilities (if needed). But I know I will feel like I didn't give it a shot for her long term schooling if I do not apply to some of them this year.

Ok so back to the research on big schools. Here is other thing I get put off in schools these days. It is what they call new-age methodologies of teaching which include multimedia enabled classrooms, computer labs with educational games/CDs and such! I mean really? For 4 year olds? I could have popped a DVD at home and have her watch it if that is what teaching is about these days! I mean I would rather have her spend her time outdoors interacting and learning with other kids (even if it is free play) than watch DVDs in a classroom.

So like I said, school fever begins again. And starting next month, you can find me standing in one of those queues at most of them schools in and around our area (even further beyond our area I'm sure)! So here's wishing myself (and my child) some luck and sending luck to all you parents out there who are in the same boat as me this year! Do keep me posted on which schools are you targeting and which you are NOT (in and around Koramangala, Bangalore).

Thinking of you and your creativity my child...

I am making new discoveries in you almost every day these days but just haven't had a chance to actually pen it all down. Here is what you have been upto over the last few months:

You graduated from pre-nursery (playschool) in March 2010. After which you've had 2 months of summer break during which you enjoyed visits from your Nana-Nani in April and your Aabu-Amma-Bua in May. With Nana and Nani, we went to ISKCON temple, Vidhan Soudha and Lalbagh garden in Bangalore. And with Aabu, Aama and Bua we went to Lalbagh garden again where you enjoyed long walks with your papa.

This was also the phase where you had taken to your Doodle-Pro and enjoyed scribbling, doodling and drawing on it. I think that was due to your previous nanny Pooja didi whom you like the most amongst all the nannies you've had to date. She used to enjoy drawing and I think got you hooked onto it as well. I remember discovering how in early April you were trying to copy strokes to actually draw something (instead of just doodling). One day mommy and papa showed you how to draw a fish and the next day, we saw you drawing it all by yourself! Here are your attempts:

A few weeks later, you were into completing some aspects of pics we would draw. For example, if I drew a face, you would draw the ears, bindi, eyes, mouth, even hair - basically whatever was missing. Until one day in May you drew a girl all by yourself! Oh how excited we all were...especially your Aabu and Bua since they are the most artistic ones in our family! Here is how your little doll's drawing looked:

And then you joined your new Montessori in early June. It has barely been 2 months since you joined but you seem to be learning so many things already that it is hard to keep up! Singing new songs, doing new dances is a norm these days. But what got the most oohs and aahs from me most recently is when you recognized certain alphabets and numbers all of a sudden just in the midst of playing. Like the other day, you were playing with an old foam alphabet-and-numbers puzzle that you've played with a million times now. But never before have you actually identified what you are fixing. So I did not think anything might have changed even now until I heard you asking "Where is number 1" this time. I started looking for the piece with number 1 on it and came across the letter I. I thought I can pass it off to you to calm you down but you actually shouted back exclaiming "This is not 1 mamma. This is I!!!" Took my breath away I tell ya!

Then the other day, we went to your cousin baby Aditya's naming ceremony over this last weekend (July 25 to be precise). At the end of that function, you were given lots of balloons to take home to play with. But guess what you did with them this time? That night at home, you asked for a pen and said I want to paint on the balloons mamma. I double checked asking you mean you want to draw/paint with a pen on this book? And you said no - you wanted to draw and paint on the balloon! And when I handed you a black sketch pen, you actually spent almost an hour drawing away on the balloon! You enjoyed it so thoroughly that you had your back towards the TV all the while when mommy and daddy enjoyed a noise free TV time - our first in ages! And when the sketchpen squeaked on the balloon, you remarked how it was making "choik choik" sound! Heehee! The session ended with the balloon bursting and you growing angry at it for bursting off and throwing the sketch pen under the couch :-) That didn't deter you though coz you had 8 more balloons in the house. So the next day you asked for the pen again and spent a good chunk of the afternoon "painting" not one but a bunch of 5 balloons tied together! By the end of each session you had black ink all over you but the joy I got trying to see your imagination at work was precious. You kept telling me what you were drawing...you kept your fingers and tried to sketch around them, drawing a smiley face on the balloon, just drawing a huge circle and coloring it within...all on the poor balloons :-) Here are some pics:

Graduation Day at School

I can't believe that I haven't had time to write about little N's first stage performance and the proud mamma moment when my little one "graduated" from her pre-nursery class (her first playschool that is). March 13, 2010 was an emotional day for us as we watched our little one perform on stage (to the "bits of paper" nursery rhyme) for the first time in her life and then actually doing the convocation walk to accept her degree certificate for her first year of school.

In my mind it was just a playschool that she went to all this while and I had enrolled her there mostly for her to socialize and interact with kids her age and have a good time. But when they actually graduate like this, our hearts well up with joy and pride reliving how much she and we have gone through to get her this far. I remember those early unsure days when I just admitted her there - she was just 1 year 9 months when she started and I used to attend with her for the entire 3 hours each day to get her to adjust and like the place. This went on for almost 3 weeks until we finally cut the chord and let her be by herself. Ofcourse she cried, ofcourse she wanted mamma but she settled down eventually and realized that the teachers there are not going to bite her nor are the other kids :-) Infact after a few months, she actually looked forward to go to her 'Meera auntie' and 'Mohini auntie' and 'Smita auntie' and happily used to recite every nursery rhyme or song or prayer they sang at school. The fact that I could completely trust these ladies who ran this place almost like a second home for kids was a huge step in my life as a mom too. I could finally trust my child with someone other than family and look forward to having 3 hours to my disposal doing 'non child' stuff :-) Not to mention the wonderful changes we saw in our little one after settling down there. She being a shy kinds suddenly opened up beautifully and her vocabulary improved amazingly as she picked up English quite fast! Now suddenly all she knew was English (instead of Hindi or Konkani that we speak at home).

In any case, I think re-living the last year and going through all the stuff me and little N have gone through just brought out tears in my eyes when I saw her graduating from this foundational year in her life. I am sure we will thank Meera and Mohini auntie for years to come for making the first year of N's school life such a wonderful experience! As they say in their school - "God bless mummy, god bless daddy, god bless teacher, god bless me!!!"

Baby Love

Just can't get these words out of my head today. My heart is gushing with so much love for my dear little baby today that I don't have the words to describe it. These are the only words that come close. So here's to my baby...the one who came in my life and filled me with this ocean of love and taught me sooooo much more than I ever knew in the past 30 years of living it myself...

You fill up my senses...

Like a night in a forest,

Like the mountains in springtime,

Like a walk in the rain....

Like a storm in the desert,

Like a sleepy blue ocean.

You fill up my senses...

Come fill me again!

'Twas a huge milestone for my little one yesterday - she went to a daycare for the first time yesterday (Feb 16, 2010). And after all the knowledge of how it is so good for them and stuff, how it will teach them to be independent, eat by themselves, etc. - the day you actually leave your child in the daycare for the first time and walk away, I tell you...it hurts like never before...almost like you left your soul behind. I could not stop crying for the entire 1.5 hours that she was there and just kept visualizing her cry for mommy when I was stepping out. She was sitting in a ball pit quietly playing with a child when I went to pick her up but I was the one who had it worse...the one who could just not forgive herself for putting her child through this. God!!! Why does baby love have to be sooooooo strong! Why does it have to be so hard? Why does it feel like a part of my heart is torn away each time I see a tear shed by her?

Sigh...I know it gets easier. Today already was. She wanted to be fed lunch by me (like yesterday) and then an hour later, let me go without a tear. And when I came back to pick her up, saw her eating her raisins from her snack box in the room with everyone else. Will never forget how she ran to me saying "I ate chhota kishmish and biiiiiiiiig kishmish". God bless her and let me NOT jinx myself or her by writing about it. Touchwood. Kalatikka. So I was saying I know it gets easier, but after being the only constant rock in her life for the past 2.5 years, after being with her day in and day out for the past 1.5 years, after her trusting me more than anyone else who loves her (including her papa), separation does get harder than ever. It probably would have not been this hard if I had not given up the job and stayed at home. The separation for the job hours would have continued matter-of-factly instead of this huge deal that it now seems. The mommy-baby love is stronger than most forms of love is what I am beginning to learn...and to let the baby think even for a moment that this person whom I trust blindly, is leaving me all alone to fend for myself in this big bag world - is NOT a good feeling to deal with. Yesterday I cried thinking that the little one will never trust me again when I told her that I'm coming in 5 minutes and then disappeared for an hour. (But then today I did not lie anymore...told her I am going to office and will come back and get her. She said ok and was happy to say goodbye as long as the teacher gave her a chocolate :-)). Also then some of my friends put some sense in my baby-love struck brain that this is what we do for getting them used to school as well right? Then this is no different - it will be good for them in the long run. So don't kill yourselves over it. Sigh - so much easier said than done :(

This happens only in India!

A holiday declared for most playschools and even some high schools on Friday for what? Coz of the solar eclipse from 11am to 3pm!!! I mean what are the working parents supposed to do if they don't have a nanny or parents at home? Are they also supposed to take off from work coz of the eclipse!!!??? Not that I am working right now but what if I did? Just makes me wanna smile and hum the tune "this happens only in India" :-)

Of school admissions and such

Wow what a morning we had - me and my child - I tell ya! Totally filmy. Started with me learning last night that one of the popular schools in our area (NPS) is giving out admission forms for Montessori and LKG starting today. And as you've read in my previous post how I've learnt that you really have to know where you want to send your child even before h/she turns 2 so that you can start the entire process in time. Gosh - little did I know what's in store for me this morning.

So first of all, some background on my rationale here. I was always of the opinion that I am not too crazy about these bigger schools yet coz my daughter is really too little right now. And even in June of next year she'll only just be 2 yrs 9 months. So still a little early for me to start worrying about her admission to LKG. The only reason I would even think of applying to big schools like NPS would be coz they have a Montessori stream of education where they take kids who turn 3 in June (give or take a few months). This way the kid gets a Montessori education and automatically goes to the 1st grade from there. So not only does the kid get the full benefit of the Montessori system for 3 years but the double benefit is that the parents do not have to worry about admissions to a bigger school again after their Montessori education is up. That was going to be the only reason that would make me even turn my head towards big schools like NPS. But again, in my mind, the school had to be very close to where we live and it had to have a warm and fuzzy feel for my kid. So when I came across the NPS HSR website last night and saw they were giving out forms starting today, I called one of my other friends who is also in the same boat as me. We both decided to drop our little ones to their playschool the next morning and then co-ordinate collecting forms from the 2 schools - NPS HSR and NPS Koramangala. Sounds simple so far right? Little did I know how huge a deal it would be for everyone that there would be a queue for miles and miles for such things. I had decided that I'll not get worked up like other parents, and coolly walk into one school and stand in line. If I get the form till 11:30 great, if not, I will leave the line, pick up N from school at 12:15, come home and try the next day. That was my plan since the start.

But reality had something else in store for me. Here's what transpired this morning. After an early start in the morning and several co-ordinating phone calls later I learn that my friend's dad has already gone to NPS HSR to collect forms for her daughter T. So reshuffling of plans hapenned amidst all the craziness of getting the little ones ready for school. I finally got out of the house, dropped N to school at 9:45am and co-ordinated with this other friend A who offered to give me a ride to the school. Reached NPS HSR at 10 and almost fell off my feet on seeing how long the queue was!!! I was almost ready to turn around and leave coz there was no way I would get even near the school gate till 11:30. And they were only giving out forms from 9-11am according to their website. Yet I tentatively dragged my feet towards the end of the spiral never ending queue and asked the lady at the tail end of the queue if this was the line for admission forms. As she turns her head towards me we both exclaim! She turns out to be my classmate from school (we'll call her S) whom I haven't met since I left school 15 years ago! Now isn't that really just like out of the movies! I said to her if this was one of my ex-boyfriends I would be meeting like this, it would be really really filmi! :-D Oh well...so we start excitedly catching up on every little detail...which hugely helped the 2 hours go by much sooner than it seemed. All the while we just couldn't get over the way met. Turns out she does not live too far from our place and has bought a new place even closer to ours now. I again digress. Back to the 'eventful morning details'. So I have most of my neighbors/friends calling me to give me real-time updates from the queue at the other school (NPS Koramangala) and such almost every 15 minutes. When the clock struck 11:30, we were in a panic mode coz we weren't too far away from the office in the queue but weren't so close that we can get the form and leave in the next 5 minutes to pick up our kids. We kept staring at the clock and at the queue. Finally both S and I made a call and asked our friends to pick up our kids from playschool. Now I've never done this before and I could not stop imagining N's little face wrinkled up in tears on not seeing mommy after school. I have seen it happen to other kids when their mommies were running late and felt terrible for that one minute of panic and sorrow the little ones find themselves in. But this call had to be made coz just the next 5-10 minutes of patience would get us those much coveted forms or else we'd have to repeat this all over again the next day for the same school and the day after for the other branch (NPS Koramangala). My friends convinced me saying she will be not be in strangers' hands...atleast she is with friends whom she knows pretty well. So she will get over it pretty quickly and will be fine if they put on Dora and prop her in front of the TV. And I would be with her in a matter of minutes anyways. S even said that there is always a first time like this...they'll have to learn to survive such things or else we'll never be able to go back to work! I kind of agreed with this thinking but obviously us moms are always full of guilt. So it killed me to stand there...but I did. I finally grabbed the form at 12:15, rushed out with S and reached home by 12:30. Went to my neighbor's to pick up N and found her in the lap of neighbor's kiddo's grandmom propped in front of Dora playing on TV but crying away saying "Let's go home!" It melted my heart and somehow convinced me that this little baby of mine is definitely not ready to go to a huge school like NPS yet. I will be sending her to one of the warm and fuzzy Montessoris nearby until she is a year or two older. Gosh! The only saving grace out of all this was that this nice friend/neighbor was able to somehow manage getting an extra form for me from NPS Koramangala as she was standing in that line this morning...thus saving me from doing this all over again tomorrow. Huge thanks G. And A and S and all of my other girlfriends who came up and offered me some much needed support without me even having to ask for it today. Such times really make me wonder - what would a girl do without such wonderful girlfriends!

Anyway, after N saw me she couldn't stop telling me to take her home. So I hugged her tight and brought her home. We cuddled on our couch and surprisingly she started telling me between her sobs how she saw Dora and Tiko and Isa and Swiper the Fox at T's house! Gosh and I thought all she did was cry out there :-) Then she asked to see Dora on her 'own' TV which I promptly obeyed. There we sat hugging each other tightly for a while and watching Dora thanking God for simple pleasures. I tried getting up to get some water for the child but she pulled me back saying "No...don't go". I was holding back tears on seeing how shaken up she was. After 5-10 minutes of cuddling, she had a bottle of milk and like a peaceful baby fell asleep cozily in my arms. I love you my little child and I am soooo not ready for you to get lost in a huge school yet.

The irony of this while episode is that I was the mom who used to crib in the US saying how everyone rushes to send their kids to school at such a young age in India...and that I'll never fall prey to that madness. And here I was this morning doing the exact same thing! Yes...I can always justify it was solely for the Montessori and what not...but part of me still knows that in the end it is a big school and she will not get the one on one attention she might get in a small or mid-size preschool. But knowing me, I am positive I will still end up filling the form and dropping it off anyway. If she does end up getting accepted, that will be another debate with self...and I don't want to even think about it right now. Will cross that bridge when I come to it. But tell me folks...isn't this falling prey to the exact system I did not want to get into in the first place? What would you have done? Would you have stuck to a mid-size Montessori and gone through this entire madness for getting admissions in the 1st grade? Or would you tackle it all right now and not have to worry about their admission process again in 2-3 years? I personally was always inclined towards not having children go through unnecessary stress so early in their lives. But still can't fail to wonder how I had almost started falling prey to this madness myself! Views? Opinions?

Schools in and around Koramangala, Bangalore

So after all the madness of searching a good Pre-school or Daycare for little N ended a few months ago, its hard to believe that it is already time to worry about where should she go next year onwards. I mean I just got her admitted to a pre-school in June and it is just now that she is actually enjoying it and learning lots from it. And already, it is barely 2 months and I have to worry about where she should go next year!!? The session next year does not even start until June 2010 but the reason we parents need to plan now is that most big schools will release admission forms in September or so (after Dussehra holidays) and you need to grab it asap to apply and be considered on a first come first served basis. Amazing na?

So as we did earlier during our pre-school research, me and my friends aka paranoid moms ;-) started our rounds of visiting schools in and around our area. Here's what we've found so far. I will continue this post in its part 2 as and when I visit more schools in the vicinity.

1). NPS Koramangala: They have both - the Montessori and the Traditional streams of education for junior school. To get admitted into Montessori 1 (first year), the child has to be 3 years of age by June of the academic year for which admission is seeked. If that does not happen, the child cannot get admitted into the Montessori stream at all (unless in cases where they make an exception if he/she has been to a different Montessori before). Now I took this at its face value and came back thinking that since N is an August born child, she is not eligible for NPS montessori at all. But many moms in our community have now informed me that they make exceptions all the time. They themselves have seen cases where there are October/November born kids in Montessori 1. So I have been advised to atleast take the form and apply.

• Pros: If your child gets into Montessori here, he/she can enjoy 3 full years of Montessori education and then go into 1st standard right here. So they get the full benefit of Montessori way of learning and you as parents need not worry about their re-admissions to a mainstream school all over again. The school follows the CBSE curriculum from 1st standard onwards.
• Cons: From all the reviews I have heard about this school, they are very academically oriented. Exams, tests, projects, etc. such a young age is not what I would want for my child - but then every parent has a different perspective. Some believe this prepares them for reality in their lives. One more thing - we asked the front desk lady to show us around the school or let us know a date when they can conduct some kind of an orientation for prospective parents and she very nicely refused to extend any sort of a courtesy on that front. I guess this school just goes by its name - either you apply or you don't. You don't get a chance to see it during or after hours.

2). Little Feat Montessori House of Children: I have already written about this place here but that was when I had not visited them yet. I now went and took a tour of this place and they seem very friendly and understanding as a management. They take admissions atleast twice a year (Dec and June). Your child will most likely get in as long as he/she is under 2.5 years of age when you contact them. And the place, their montessori material, infrastructure is pretty good too. I have a lot of friends whose kids go here and the parents are all happy.

3). Vibgyor High (HSR) : The front desk lady here was very different from the one we met at NPS. She actually took a lot of time to show us 4 moms (with our toddlers) around the school. It is a nicely built place with a lot of facilities for the kids and the best part is - they have after school day care on the premises! So kids can spend the rest of the afternoon there if both the parents go to work. To qualify for admission here, the kid needs to be atleast 2 yrs 9 months by June of the academic year. This is when he/she will get admitted into Nursery. If they are atleast 3 yrs 9 months, they get into LKG and then UKG and so on. So according to my kiddo's birthdate, she being August born, will be 2 yrs 10 months in June 2010 and so will absolutely qualify here (unlike at NPS where she needs to be 3 yrs of age). They follow the ICSE board curriculum.

• Pros: This school claims they do not have a midterm and final exams structure until 4th standard. They do have weekly assessments to judge a child's progress and grade him accordingly. Again, some parents prefer the traditional approach to prepare their child early on. I am not in one of those camps. I would rather my child learn through experiencing things first hand than cramming and taking tests/exams. Another pro, getting admissions into this school seems relatively easier since they are brand new. This is their first functional year.
• Cons: School is quite far from Koramangala - took us 30 minutes to get there. Might be a good option if you live in Sarjapur or HSR Layout. Also, the campus was pretty much all concrete. And for folks like me who have grown up in schools which has ample ground space for sports like cricket, football, high jump, long jump, PT, etc. it did not appeal much to the eyes. Was too much concrete for my taste.

Other schools we plan to visit in the near future are:

• DPS (have heard they have a very good campus)
• Prakriya (have heard very good things about this school - their campus, curriculum, way of teaching and their nursery)
• Headstart Montessori House of Children (have heard that this Montessori also has classes upto 5th currently and they have aquired land for more)
• Bethany High (this school has also recently launched a child care center for infants and toddlers who can attend pre-school here and move on to Bethany High from there)

Do let me know if you think of other schools that I should add to my list here. If not, do keep checking for Part 2 of this post.

EDITED ON Oct. 10, 2009 TO ADD : NPS Indiranagar has started giving out admission forms and their other branches (Koramangala and HSR) might start the coming week.

School Progress Report

So it has been a month now since little N started her first school in life. Her first day was Thursday June 4, 2009 and poor baby had just cried her lungs out the entire 30 minutes. Today on Monday, July 6 I can proudly say that my little baby (I should get over the fact that she is no more a baby but a toddler now huh) has not only stopped crying completely but is actually participating in the activities and learning songs and dances and even showing off at home doing those! What a transformation in just 4 weeks! But oh how long and stressful those 4 weeks were! Not a day passed by when I doubted myself on whether I was doing the right thing by sending her to a playschool at this age. And any comment from any stranger about how little she was and already going to school just made me melt all the more. After she cried violently for the first 2 days, her teachers called me in to see if that would calm her down. And that is when I suggested that I sit with her at school for a few days until she starts trusting them and growing comfortable there. They were nice enough to let me do it and I think thankfully that was the magic charm.

For most other kids, cold turkey approach might work but I know mine is more of a gradual type. For settling in at school, she needed reassurance that mommy was not abandoning her and that her teachers will not harm her. Once she saw that they are mommy's friends too and that mommy is not there to abandon her, she grew comfortable and started playing a little and enacting some songs at school. So that's what I did for the next two and a half weeks. I would go with her at around 9:30 and sit with her untill 11:30 or 12noon every day. Finally we started talking about how to taper it off. Luckily we got an opportunity when my buaji from Pune came to stay with us for the week of June 22. That week on Tuesday, June 23 we decided that we will try and leave N alone at school even if it was for just half an hour each day. And we made sure that this first day, daddy will drop her to school and not mommy. Coz little N is different with each parent - she comes to mommy for comfort and nourishment. And with daddy, she is more playful in general. And she is more used to seeing daddy leave her every morning to go to the office and coming back to her in the evening. So we figured we should give it a try and send her to school with daddy. And that is what we did. That first day of her school, I was so jumpy and kept checking my phone every 5 minutes to see if her school called asking me to come at once and get her. But none of that hapenned. Apparently, she cried when hubby dear left her but he has a stronger heart than mine. He calmly told her that daddy is going to office and will come back and get her and walked off and came back home! I could never have done that. I would be pacing stressfully outside her school (like I did the first 2 days). Then one of her teachers (Meera auntie) made sure to convey to me through our other friend whose kid goes there too that N was fine...not crying violently as before...just sobbing a little off and on. I picked her up an hour later (around 10:30am) and ofcourse she cried when she saw me. But they said her crying was much lesser this time than the first 2 days 3 weeks ago. So the next day, I dropped her to school and she cried when I left. But quietened down in a minute. I remember how bad I felt that day and even called my mom asking if I am doing the right thing. My mom was my pillar of strength that day reassuring me that this is for N's own good and that she will make new friends and enjoy much more there. She will learn to be a little more independent instead of clinging on to mommy most of the day. So I need to have a stronger heart and let her try this atleast for a week or two. She was the only one encouraging me not to give up yet - even my dad and hubby were not so sure :-)

Luckily by Friday, her words came true. When I went to pick up N from school on Friday, Meera auntie said these magical words to me "you will be proud to hear that your daughter actually did Ringa Ringa Roses and Mulberry Bush and participated in all the songs and dances today!" I could not believe my ears and eyes! There she was playing with a kitchen set and not with her favorite Meera auntie but with the other kids and teachers at school! And when I asked her - N shall we go home? She actually said "Naa"! No tears, no wailing...instead she wanted me to come play kitchen with her at school! Thank God for this day. I never knew such a day would arrive.

Since that day, she actually walks with me to school (instead of insisting to be carried) and we sing and hop and skip along the way. She still gives me a sad look when I leave her at the gate (which melts my heart with a pinch of guilt even today). But the fact that at home she is so happilly singing songs she learnt at school and generally associates school with happiness makes me get over all that guilt before I know it. I actually feel proud on days when I ask her what you did at school and she says things like "slide" or "bubbles" or "ringa ringa roses" or the most interesting was when she said "puzzles". I was shocked to hear that word coz she never said it before and has only learnt it at school. I can see so many changes in her behavior now with just 1.5 weeks of her going by herself (without mommy). She has become much more social, more independent in playing by herself, eating herself, sings a lot more songs these days (is singing and humming nursery rhymes and other school songs most of the time) and most of all - her fear of others trying to talk or play with her has come down drastically. Before I used to jokingly call her a 'touch-me-not' baby coz she would shrink or cry whenever a new person approached her :-)

So I am writing this to remind myself that although I felt like a horrible mom subjecting my child to a cozy little playschool at 1 year and 9 months - it ain't all that bad afterall! Infact I can now proudly say that my little baby is enjoying and learning so much more every day and I can use that little time for myself to keep me and my family so much more happier. God bless Mohini and Meera auntie and my little one who is growing into such a "samajhdaar" young child.

First Day at School

A new chapter of her life begins...she has grown into a school going toddler...trotting away from home...stepping into a new life one tiny step at a time. I have mixed emotions in my heart as she steps into this world out of the shelter of her cozy little home and family. She will now have to learn to fend for herself, live without her mommy and daddy for a bit and be happy knowing that they will surely come back to get me in their arms. I never thought I would be this emotional today especially since I have gone back to work when she was 3 months old, leaving her home with a very nice lady (her nanny). But then when she turned a year old, we moved from the US to Bangalore and I decided to work from home and then eventually quit working to make sure she settles down completely before I decide to take up something full time here. So today was her first attempt at trying to make it on her own in the midst of lots of other kids. Here are a few pictures from our first day at school:

Happily Walking to School

Enjoying the Swing at School

They told us that school will only be for 30 minutes (9:30 - 10:00am) today and tomorrow (Thursday, Jun 4 2009 and Friday, Jun 5 2009). It is mainly to acclimatize the kids to this new environment. Next week will be longer durations, depending on the child's comfort level. So how did she do today you ask? Well...not so good as I feared. She started crying when Mohini auntie first took her from me but quietened down soon when she started showing her around the lovely campus. That was when I slipped away. After the half hour was up, Meera brought her to me. They said she cried almost throughout...would quieten down at times, ask for me, and when she didn't see me, would cry again. Gosh I have never seen her head shake so vigorously and nodding sideways as when I took her back in my arms. She quietened down immediately...sobbing slowly but calmly. Then when she saw the 2 dogs in the house, she suddenly said "doggie" and was fine again. Then she sat in the swing, did the slides and generally played there for another hour or so. She was fine as long as mommy was there with her. Thank god atleast she didn't hate everything about the place and the day! She came back home pretty happy with herself and singing away. She even told me the auntie's names and has agreed to go back tomorrow. Let's hope she doesn't start bawling at the sight of school tomorrow (as she does when she sees we are going to the doctor's office)!

So here are the only friends she made at school today:

Her 2 friends at school - Bono and Nano (Mohini Auntie's pet dogs)

And here are the 2 great ladies who run this place Kinder Kare with so much love and care:

Mohini Auntie (N calls her Mo Auntie)

Meera Auntie

Daycare Centers and Preschools in Koramangala, Bangalore

So I have now officially joined the bandwagon of "paranoid moms" - not just being paranoid about daycares and preschools myself but spreading this fever to all the friends around me who are moms to kids in a similar age group as mine! Ain't I so evil ;) heeheehee

Nyways, it all started with a job interview I was actively pursuing. And the decision of whether I should take up the job if offered weighed largely on whether I would be able to find a very good home away from home for little N. In the US, I was able to work without much guilt coz I had a wonderful nanny who loved N just like she was her own child. But here, I am yet to find either a nanny or a daycare who will give her the love, warmth, intellectual stimulation and hygeine all at the same time. So over the past few weeks, I have been spending a lot of time each day researching and visiting daycare centers and preschools around our neighborhood in Bangalore. Hauling a toddler around to each facility is in itself a huge pain - forget coming home, thinking, comparing and racking my brain to figure out what is good or bad about each place and what are the options my kiddo has. So I thought I'd do this in written so that it gives me some clarity and also help out some of you who might be looking for this information out there.

This analysis is purely my opinion based on my personal research and talking to a lot of folks whose kids go to many of these places listed here.

I have finally begun to understand a little bit about the early years educational system here. Figured out that Daycare is a term given to something like babysitting where your kid is basically in their care, being fed and kind of hangs out in the premises but not necessarily with a structured routine. Pre-School is more of a structured program where they have an hour of two of instructor led activities. Pre-school (also called Playschool) starts at age 1 year 10 months at most places. When the kid turns 2.5 years old, you have more options for him/her. You can continue to keep them in the pre-school or opt for a Montessori. Montessoris generally accept kids at the age of 2.5 and continue their education upto 6 years of age. So your kid can either be in a pre-school (which is the traditional Playgroup, Nursery, LKG, UKG) or a Montessori upto the age of 6. Or you can pull him out of either and admit him to a high school (which offers education upto grade 10 or 12) for LKG at around 4.5 years of age. You can pretty much do this from a Pre-school to a regular school whenever you prefer (LKG or UKG or 1st standard) but Montessoris generally recommend children to stay on for atleast 3 years to obtain the full benefits of the Montessori method. And some believe that research has proven that kids who went through the Montessori program in their early years have grown up to be smarter.

Anyways, so here is a listing of all the daycares, pre-schools and montessoris I have visited, heard of or done some research on in Koramangala, Bangalore. Hope this helps atleast some of you who are looking for such consolidated information online.

1. Little Elly - This was the first ever place I visited so was not quite sure what questions to ask and what to look for etc. But after talking to the management there, I was pretty satisfied with the way they did things around there. The only thing that bothered me was that their toddler program (which is what my N would have gone to then) was only for 2 hours each day. I was really looking for a place that would keep them for 3-4 hours so that they can bond, socialize and get a feel of spending a good amount of time away from mommy. That way I could ease her into a full time program if I wanted to start working soon. Other than that, I liked their facilities, teachers and the overall hygiene.

• Pros: They do have daycare facilities after the child's school is done. So after 9-11am, the child can still stay there upto 6:30pm (daycare charges extra). Huge plus for working parents.
• Cons: If all you want is a playschool, they only run it for 2 hours per day. Paying around 30K for 2 hours per day seems a bit too much.
  

2. Child-Care Montessori - This place has been running its Montessori Pre School in 5th Block Koramangala for over a year and had recently opened up their Day Care center in 3rd block, Koramangala which is much closer to our place. So it sounded great since it is a Montessori cum Daycare center which means they accept children as young as 3 months of age. Obviously at that age, they would be treated as daycare children but if they continue there for a while, they will automatically be registered for the Montessori education program at 2.5 years of age.

• Pros: I visited only their Day Care center which I really liked. They have very clean premises (great hygeine ranks very high in my list) and have good equipment overall for infants - such as good quality cribs, toddler beds, toys (indoor and outdoor). I also loved the folks running this place, their thoughts and philosophy.
  
• Cons: I did not really like that my child at 1.8 years of age will be hanging out at the daycare center which was still so new that it did not really have a lot of other kids her age to socialize with. It also did not have a structured routine as such for this age group so was more like a daycare where they would pretty much do what they feel like and hang out with a maid most of the time. If I was working fulltime though, this might be a decent place to leave my kid for the time being.
  

3. KinderKare - This is primarily a home based day care which accepts kids around 2 years of age. They have a 3 hour program for these toddlers and they heavily encourage free play.

• Pros: I liked the fact that they have a total of around 30 kids total in the age group from 2 to 4.5 years of age. All of these kids spend most of their time together so it is more like a montessori environment with some structure. I loved the 2 ladies who run this place and their overall attitude of doing it more for a passion than making money in the business. They seemed very understanding and flexible to accomodate these little ones totally understanding that they are not used to a routine of any kind yet since this is their first school ever. I think they will be ideal for my little N's first school and ideal for me as well since this is a stone's throw away from my place. So no putting her in a car seat and driving her to school every morning. All I have to do is enjoy a nice 5 minute walk.
• Cons: They only offer a 3 hour program and do not have a full day daycare offering. So not an ideal place for working parents.
  

4. Vilma's Daycare - This is small cozy little daycare run by a nice lady who runs it in a home (does not necessarily live there though). They accept infants as young as 3 months as well and have a few teachers for the toddlers. I was not too keen on this place as it did not seem big enough for me (all the kids hung out in one living room for play time, meal time, reading time etc.) They said they spend an hour outdoors each day in a nearby park. But as I mentioned earlier, I have a high hygeine standard and this place did not fare too well for me in that department.

5. Planet Kids - Great huge premises. I should say by far the best I have seen in Koramangala. They have a huge place with all sorts of outdoor activities including things such as a splash pool. Indoors, they have a huge ball pit, a media room (with a huge flat screen TV) and a computer lab as well! So facilities wise the place ranked # 1 in my rating but I was not too impressed by their management and their overall attitude.

• Pros: Great campus. Have various locations in Bangalore so you can transfer your child to a nearby location if you move. Also have full time daycare facilities for working parents.
  
• Cons: Management did not show too much understanding and flexibility for kids who are going to a school for the first time ever. I am also not a huge fan of putting kids in front of a TV or computer as at this young an age.
  

6. Little Paradise - Is a preschool as well as daycare center.

• Pros: Offers day care facilities so is a plus for working parents.
• Cons: Heavily overcrowded. The daycare area is not seperate so infants sleeping are surrounded by playing toddlers all around.
  

7. Little Feat Montessori House of Children - I have personally not visited this facility since they do not accept kids younger than 2.5 years of age. But from all that I have heard and researched, this Montessori has nothing but good reviews all around. I have a lot of friends whose kids go there and have only heard good things about the people who run this place and the overall reputation, their attitude towards kids, etc. The only con I have heard is that they have 10 classes running but their facilities are not very huge both for indoor and outdoor play.

8. Head Start Montessori House of Children - I have not visited this facility either since they too do not accept kids younger than 2.5 years of age. But again, this place has great reviews from all that I have read about it. The only thing is that getting an admission here is next to impossible - they fill up with siblings of existing kids one or more years in advance!

9. Eurokids - Not visited this school either but have friends whose kids go here and are extremely happy about the place, teachers and curriculum. The big pro is that they have presence all over India so if you move around a lot, this is certainly beneficial for you.

10. Vivaa International - Not visited this place myself but have a few friends whose kids go there. Have heard mixed reviews about this place about their management of kids. The pro is that they are a Montessori which offers day care facilities as well so your kid can either spend the day here if you are working or go here after school for the remainder of the day.

11. Roots to Wings -This is a new chain of pre-schools owned and run by the Singapore based company Educomp. I was very interested in this since they claim to be very different from the rest in their philosophy and curriculum so thought why not check it out.

• Pros: The pro I liked was that they do accept kids at a very young age (around 1.5 years). And since they are so new, they do offer trial weeks where you can send the kids for 2 weeks free of charge to see if they really like it.
• Cons: The biggest con for me was that they were too new (no kids enrolled in the center that just opened up in Koramangala). So although they seemed to have all the knowledge in theory, I would feel more comfortable if I had seen them actually working with kids in real life. They were great at showing their powerpoint presentations about their well researched curriculum and the "seven petal approach" but when it came to practical questions from a mom such as how will you potty train my kid...they were not able to put me at ease (obviously coz they had never done it before!)
  

12. Planet Bloomingdale - Not visited this place myself since I had not heard any good reviews about it but I do know that they have a full time daycare for infants.