A Healthier and Happier 2012

I am normally not a resolutions person coz the moment I keep them, I  know I will fizzle out in a few weeks time. So after many years of no new resolutions, something in me made me take one this New Years. (Actually the something and the roots of it is another post in itself). So on January 1 2012, I decided this will be the year I will start focusing on me and my family's health. We will change the way we eat for the better and change all our bad (read: lazy) habits for good. This will not only make us healthier but will also set a good example for our little daughter to follow in her life. It has been 8 months now and I feel good knowing that my relationship with food is only getting healthier and stronger each day. My best moments are when my 5 year old says to me "Mommy, I want to eat Panjiri" or "Give me more cucumber" or "I want to do yoga with you".

Here are some changes I have made towards a more healthier me:

• Completely cut out tea, coffee and sodas - basically all caffeinated beverages.
• Cut down drastically on refined sugar.
• Take a shot of wheatgrass every day.
• Include more raw vegetables in my diet (atleast one portion of salad each day).
• Include more dry fruits in our daily diet (atleast a handful of soaked almonds each day).
• Include more fruits in my daily diet (atleast twice a day).
• Bought a good juicer and started consuming vegetable / fruit juices (atleast once in 2 days).
• Switched from white rice to brown and/or red rice. 
• Switched from refined sugar to palm sugar and/or jaggery.
• Switched from plain wheat flour to multigrain flour.
• Started consuming organic food as much as possible.
• Resumed my yoga practice (after taking a break from it ever since lil N was born).

And you know what is the best change of all? We got a pet pup in May which has led to more exercise for us all :-) I love the mornings when I actually have time to do 30 minutes of yoga followed by taking the dog out for a run. Those mornings also include us meeting with his friends in the apartment complex. It is a complete body and mind therapy for both - the pup and me:-) Ah...I cannot describe how good I feel the rest of that day! You know the icing on the cake? While I am doing yoga at home, hubby dear is out dropping lil N to school and doing his morning brisk walk in a park near the school for an hour after that. So both of us are happy our workout for the day is over with. On weekend mornings all of us head out into the tennis court for a doggies play date where we meet up our dog owner friends (with their pets ofcourse) and all of us have a great time hanging out.

So I am sure it is not much of a surprise that this is the year we finally gave birth to our own venture towards spreading health - www.shophealthy.in as well as a new blog where I blog exclusively on health related topics - http://shophealthy.blogspot.in

So what do you all do to stay healthy and happy? Tell me more...I am curious to hear.  

For the Love of Mexican Food

Why do people take a seemingly straightforward spelling and twist it to the extent of confusing the rest? And then there are more who take the already twisted spelling, twist it some more and change the entire context??? Wanna know what I am rambling about? I will tell you what...

This past Saturday was my birthday (don't ask me which one). My hubby dear was generous enough to offer to take me to lunch wherever I wanted to go. And that itself is a huge offer considering going anywhere in Bangalore will take a minimum of 45 mins to an hour on a weekend. So I searched and surfed online, checked through all my options, checked with my heart on what it wanted to be fed and decided Mexican it is. I was really craving for some yummy juicy Enchiladas, Nachos and other such comfort bean filled food. On checking around, there seemed to be hardly any Mexican places in Bangalore. So there we were - our close friends, us and my cousin - standing near our cars at 12:30 still wondering where to go. We call some more friends and check with them. Only suggestions we got were Woodstok, Habanero and Chilis. Now given that we had already gone to Woodstok last year for my birthday and our friends had visited Habanero just a week ago, Chilis it was. So we called JustDial for their number and they sent me the landline number for the one on Old Airport Road. Incidentally, the friend who recommended it had been there a month ago and loved it. But the friends who were going with us were pretty confident that it has already closed down. So we called Chilis to make sure they are open and to book a table. They were not answering. So what would a person do next? As expected, I called JustDial to see if they have any other number for them. They did not. My next question to them was - so is there any other Chilis in Bangalore? Oh yes - in Whitefield - pat came the reply. So ofcourse we grabbed that number and called them to book a table for us right away and asked them for directions. The guy on the other line just gave me some silly landmarks without any directions from Koramangala. When I asked him the entire route, he said where are you coming from? And when I said Koramangala, he seemed a little surprised saying this is in Whitefield madam. I snapped back saying so what...just give me the damn directions! He did as told and hung up - without asking for my contact number or number of people for booking our table. I was a little surprised that he did not take my number etc. and was about to call him back but hubby calmed me down saying we'll get there soon - not a big deal.

So we finally set out all hungry for feasting on a Mexican spread...drove 21kms on the awful roads full of construction and traffic, from Koramangala to Whitefield, tracked down the landmarks he gave and finally an hour later, saw the Big Bazar he mentioned. Soon enough we pulled over coz our friend's car had pulled over before us and my hubby showed me on our left, a place called Chilly's. My first reaction - "Not this one dear...we need to go ahead, cross Big Bazaar." My cousin and hubby had to struggle to hold back their laughter at the reality that faced us and jumped out of the car to talk to our friends about Plan-B. Did you realize what just happened here? Read the spellings again. Turns out that this restaurant was an Andhra Style joint called Chilly's (not the American franchise called Chilis)!!!! And not an upscale or fast food place at that but kinda like your Shantisagars across town! Imagine the look of horror on my face and the anger I felt for JustDial!!! I could not believe we drove across town to find an Andhra style hole in the wall!!! I was still in denial and actually called them again from right outside their hotel to ask which cuisine is their food. And the guy seemingly irritated by now said Andhra style madam! As if I should have already known that!!! Grrrrrrrrrrrr. The only thing that partially saved us from me actually chewing down someone was that Habanero was not too far from this place. So off we went to Habanero for my birthday lunch. It was not the best Mexican I had tasted plus the bar was closed due to a dry day in the city (which we were not aware of) but atleast it was still Mexican. Sigh!!!

Just to cross check, I scanned through my JustDial SMS messages once more and noticed they had spelt the first one Chilis and the second one Chillys but we never noticed the difference coz they had promptly provided the second option in response to my query for another Mexican restaurant Chilis in town! Gosh - for the love of trademarks and spellings! Now you know what I meant in the opening line? If only no one had  twisted the original word "chilies" into Chilis, no one else would have come along to put another twist to it to call it Chilly's!!!   

Anyway...as they say...all is well that ends well. The day ended beautifully with a visit to the temple followed by a surprise party when we got home - something I had never even suspected. Completely managed by my hubby and dear friends. I mean, its not that we have not done this before but somehow our birthdays since N has been born have been pretty low key since the excitement is mostly saved up for the little one's birthdays now :-) Hence, this came as a total surprise to me.  My shock aside, the joy and surprise on lil N's face when we entered home after the temple and saw it full of people was priceless! She was soooo lit up and just could not stop asking me - "But mama, how did they enter our home?" :-)

All in all, the day was full of 2 surprises - one thanks to JustDial and Chillys (or should I say Chilis) and other thanks to my hubby and friends.

One Year

Today marks the completion of one year of service with my current employer here in India. Today, incidentally, is also my parent's 35th wedding anniversary.

One year....seems to be such a looooong time and yet sometimes feels like it flew by. And although working in the corporate world is not new to me since that is all I have been doing the past 12+ years (ever since I graduated), this one year is much more different and unique in my mind. Coz this is the year I worked with a new personal title "working mom". And that too not in a country such as the US where most moms end up going back to work any way because they have excellent day care facilities and better work-life balance in general. But in a country like India where going back to work is much more difficult (in my mind) if you are like me who does not have a support system like parents or in-laws or an army of maids around you. Ofcourse I went back to work 3 months after my baby was born but I was in the US then and that's what everyone did. Most new moms there either found a daycare or a good nanny and didn't even consider staying at home as a viable option. Atleast not amongst the people I knew. And atleast not in the mindset I was in where career and ambition was foremost in our minds.

But things changed when we R2Ied. This was when my daughter turned exactly a year old (notice how we've been taking significant steps every one year or so?). Our move back to India kind of forced me to step back and really think....take some time out to get adjusted...help get settled...spend time with my little one and evaluate my priorities overall. And I did take almost a year to make the decision to go back to work. I remember how I was still struggling with the prospect of leaving my daughter in the hands of a maid around this time last year when this job came my way. I was not even actively looking but this very professional staffing manager was pursuing me for the current job. I remember not even entertaining his calls the first few times but finding how persistent he was piqued my interest. And I thought why not give it a shot...for this role was something close to my heart anyway. And it sounded exiting since it meant starting a whole new function in India from scratch. I was very sure I could excel in this role but equally unsure about how I would manage the child-care front here in this new city without any reliable maids as of yet or any good daycare option too. So that's how I started last year...very unsure of every step I took...constantly double guessing my decision...going on mommy guilt trips every single day for the first 5-6 months of working...hating the unreliability of maids in India or the availability of good day care centers nearby...in general really struggling to find a balance between home and work.

Until today where I can step back and marvel at how we made it through. A huuuuuuuge chunk of credit goes to my really supportive hubby who kept me going every time I faltered due to mommy guilt. And of-course also to my very very endearing, accommodating and loving little daughter who finally did understand that mommy has to go to work for her sanity and for her to be a happier person in life which in turn will help keep everyone at home happy as well :-) And I think a huge amount of credit also goes to the company I work for which is very different from many other companies in India that I have seen in terms of understanding the value of providing flexibility and good work-life-balance opportunities. I totally admire the culture they have fostered and would absolutely recommend such employers for all working moms out there.

Heartache

N's grandparents (grandpa, grandma and aunt) left for Bombay 4 days ago (on Sunday, Jan 2) after staying with us for 3 weeks during N's Christmas break. She has been missing them soooo much since then. The night before they were leaving, she went to each one of them saying "I don't want you to go :(" It was tough explaining to her that they have to go for now but will come back soon.

They were leaving very early on Sunday morning and I made sure I woke her up early morning at around 4am when they were leaving so that she can say goodbye. Or else she would wake up to a rude surprise to find them gone and be very unhappy. So I remind her about how she said bye to them each time she asks for them. Luckily for her, Sunday was relatively easy since 2 of my cousins (lil N's P mama and R maasi with her 2 boys) came to visit us. So she had company around to distract her. But after that she has been asking me when will Nana and Nani (my mom and dad) come. Sigh!

The next day (Monday) she woke up and her first words were "where are my amma, aabu and bua?" I reminded her again and since school was reopening, got her ready and packed her off to school. I knew it would really hit her hard when she got back and did not find anyone (including her mom and dad) at home unlike the last few weeks and we had been on vacation too along with her grandparents. So sure enough she came back from school and looked for them in every room at home and then asked her didi (our maid) when are her amma, aabu and bua coming back.

After 4 days have passed, she has come back to her routine of school and stuff but still misses them. She does seem to have come to terms with what we've been telling her though - that they sat in an aeroplane and went to their Bombay home. They will come back again in a few months.

I feel sad for her and have been going home a little earlier than usual from work so that she does not feel too lonely. She does seem to be okay now and is mostly back to her normal routine. But she sure seems to have made up her mind for the next time. Here is what she plans:

A snippet of our conversation last night while putting N to sleep:

N: Mummy, when will my Aabu, Amma and Bua come again?

Me: Hmmm...(thinking of a suitable number of weeks to be given to her)

N: When they come back again, I want to tie them and not let them go back!

Me (smiling and not so surprised at her plan): Okay sweetie, I will help you tie them okay?

N: Yes, we will tie them in our drawing room. Okay mamma?

Me: Okay sweetie, now go to sleep.

Sigh! Come back again Amma, Aabu and Bua - your lil N misses you so!

December = Loads of Fun!

December in our house has somehow always meant loads of fun. For this is the month when we celebrate our anniversary, my hubby's birthday, Christmas and the New Year! Soooooo many occasions to party, buy and give gifts, have cake and most of all - spend tonnes of quality time with family.

So this December as little N's school was on a 2 week Christmas break, we had planned her grandparents and bua's trip to our place during the same time. N's amma and abu (grandpa and grandma) flew over from Bombay on Dec 11 for a good 3 weeks stay. And bua joined us on Dec 22. And more than us, it was lil N who was the MOST excited! You can just say she has been having a blast ever since they arrived. Our home has been always full of relatives visiting us - both from out of town to the ones in Bangalore itself. N has not had a houseful of so many people since a year ago when it was my brother's wedding. Ofcourse she has had trips to her Nana Nani's or Dada Dadi's home but never a house full of people like we've been having these days. And frankly, I am enjoying all this for a change too. This is the part I really really like about moving back to India. Family! Nothing like it!

So here's what we've been doing over the past few weeks:

Our Anniversary

All of us went to a nearby Ganesh temple followed by a typical Andhra style dinner served on banana leaves and such. Was good fun and lil N was the most overjoyed by it - she actually ate curd and rice with her hands and made a good mess but insisted on slurping it up all by herself! Hubby gifted me some good designer jewelry from Tanishq and I put together a nice personal photo calendar for him with important dates marked so that he does not forget.

Christmas

N had a great time decorating the Christmas tree this year not just by herself but with her close friend A. Both of them had a blast putting up all the tree decorations at our place. N insisted on hanging every single item on one branch and was very upset when we finally intervened and "re-balanced" the look :-)

She then had an invitation for a Christmas party at a friend's place which she enjoyed but missed seeing Santa since mommy had to come back for a meeting and N refused to stay back with the maid. Then she spotted her first Santa this year at a department store where we went grocery shopping one weekend. Santa shook hands with her and mommy made him gift her a chocolate she loves (Kinder Joy - she calls it Egg Chocolate). The store guys even took a picture of her with Santa and gave her a complimentary copy which thrilled her to no bounds. Her second encounter with Santa was at the Christmas party in our apartment complex on Dec 24. That Santa gave her 2 Eclairs and she was so happy. Then we told her Santa will come visit her home and when she wakes up the next morning there will be a gift for her under her Xmas tree. Mommy had packed a finger painting set with a notebook and stickers for her. N loved it the next morning and spent atleast an hour painting with it. She even sat with her baby (her teddy bear) under her tree the night before explaining the funda of Santa to him for quite a while. Interestingly though after taking her pic with Santa in the store the other day she asked me on her way home "Mommy who was in the Santa suit?" I was a little heart broken that she kinda suspected Santa was not real. So I debated with myself for a bit but decided to tell her the truth anyway - so I said it was an uncle. She asked why was he wearing Santa suit so I said because uncle knows that children love Santa that's why.

Hubby's Birthday

Poor hubby's birthday was the most hilariously disastrous event this month. Started with him wanting to go to a certain restaurant for lunch. By the time all 6 of us finished with our breakfast, bathing and getting ready routine, it was already 1pm. Then when we were just about to step out, the plumber whom we had called early in the morning finally decided to show up for some repair work in our kitchen. That took another 30 mins and left our tummies growling. So we called ahead to make sure we have a table ready and finally reached the place in a huge hurry. But the person who was showing us to our table there had a major attitude issue and was really rude in general. We hated the table he had reserved for us and he did not even apologize or ask us to wait for another one. All he said was "We hate this table too but since you called ahead, we kept it open for you!!!" Imagine that! So we said "You can keep the table for yourself!" and walked out of that place. Next we drove to another outlet of the same restaurant which was around 20 mins away. Given our luck, they had absolutely no tables available there for another hour and so we were again stuck wondering where to go. Debated a few places on the way and finally went to one that used to have a good buffet. Reached, took our seats all hungry and tired only to find out that they have stopped serving the buffet recently!!! Ugh! We gave up and finally shoved some food into our faces and got out of there. Picked up some dessert on the way and reached home saying thank god the disastrous lunch is over :-)

All day though N was the most excited member in the house telling everyone she met that it was her papa's happy birthday today. And she went on to add that her amma and abu and bua have come from Bombay!!! She kept singing "Happy Birthday to Papa" all day and also kept asking us to start celebrating papa's birthday (which meant she wanted the cake cutting ceremony to to be held right away). She was the most thrilled when papa finally cut the cake in the evening and gave her a huge helping of plum cake with vanilla ice cream.

A Day at the Park

On Dec 29, us and a few of our friends decided to take the kids to Cubbon park in the city. Me and hubby had already taken this last week in Dec as vacation time from work to ensure maximum quality time with the family was spent. And we had planned a trip to Waynad that never actually happened due to a booking goof-up by the travel website. That's how we were home and planning day trips to places like Cubbon Park. So this park in Bangalore is known for its 'Bal Bhavan' which has many areas for the kids to play in, an aquarium and the main attraction being a train ride. Turns out my lil N has never ever sat in a train before. So obviously she was overjoyed at the thought of sitting in a train and even after it was done, she kept asking all afternoon why the train did not take her again. The kids (N, her friends A and A) had a blast! They visited the aquarium, admired all the fish, had a joy ride in the train and then played to their heart's content in 3 different parks. By the time we got home late afternoon, we were dead tired and hit the bed instantly.

New Year's Eve

Thankfully since the time we moved to India, we have never had to plan our New Year's Eve or any other festival for that matter. Our huge apartment complex and the wonderful cultural society in it hosts very good celebrations for most of these occasions. And the best part - parents like us with little kids do not have to travel to or from the event and can run back home if the child is tired or cranky or go back and forth whenever we feel like it. So this New Year's too we took tickets to the "Midnight Masquerade" bash being organized at our complex's tennis court. And apart from the food that was mostly over by the time we hit the counters, I really REALLY enjoyed the dancing this year. Last year it rained and it being an outdoor party, the dance floor and food stalls were all empty due to the rains. Some brave ones like us took umbrellas and ventured out again and danced on wet floors and even though it stopped raining in half an hour, the fun had halted. This year, thankfully it wasn't even cold and it didn't rain. And most of all, my lil N was overjoyed at songs like "Sheila ki jawani" and other latest hits. I guess it was because that she could actually identify many songs this year and wanted to dance to most of them was what made it wonderful for me. I actually had a dance partner this year and one who was more overjoyed and enthusiastic about dancing than I was. Believe me - she was the one pulling me to dance and I was worn out but she just kept going and going! Knock on wood. She did not even want to stop for dinner so I let her go on from around 8 to 10pm. After which she ate just a little bit and was too tired to do anything else after that. She did stay up though until around 12:30am and then slept on couch while all 6 of us snuggled in front of the TV. A nice, good, enjoyable and cozy New Year's Eve was had. Thank god for that.

And here's wishing you all a very happy and healthy New Year as well. I know December is the season for being merry...so do tell me how did you all enjoy the passing of last year. Any fun vacations or events to talk about?

Some weekend conversations with N

We had a hectic Saturday this past weekend - spent most of it outdoors so wanted to take it easy on Sunday. I decided to clean N's toys this Sunday morning to sort out old unused stuff into items for donation, discarding and keeping and empty out a cabinet to organize her toys better. Spent a good 2 hours on that, found toys that she hadn't played with in ages and N had a blast rediscovering the joys of silly things such as plastic monster's teeth, screeching bean ball, basket ball (with its lost hoop that I put up again for her), a new swinging and pull up bar that we put up for her as well, etc. After all that fun, we crashed on the bed in the afternoon hoping that all 3 of us would enjoy a nice afternoon siesta. But she usually gets very playful when we get horizontal even if it is late at night. Infact her daily bedtime routine that she really looks forward to is a good playful wrestle with her daddy after which mommy has to wind her down with a story and what not.

So back to this Sunday afternoon...while some of her wrestling and rolling around and jumping on our backs got a little rough, I said to her:

Me: Beta...don't hurt papa so much, he will get boo.

N (sulking): I don't like No! You are not a nice mamma!

Me (quite amused at her reaction): I am not a nice mamma? Ok so what should we do?

N: No! You are not a nice mamma! I want a new mamma!

Me: Oh really? Tell your papa to get a new mamma!

N: Papa - I want a new mamma!

Papa: (just enjoying a good chukle)

Me: Okay tell me - who do you want as your mamma? B auntie or A auntie or G auntie? (naming a few of my close friends whose kids and my lil N hang out almost every day).

N: B auntie.

Me (Just amused and awed to see her clarity in preferences and thoughts): Really? Not G auntie or A auntie?

N: No - I want B auntie as my mamma.

Sigh! I guess this is what I get when I threaten her to take T as my baby when my lil N is not listening to me (T is G auntie's daughter).

******************************

Normally when N wakes up every morning, she is just like me - cranky, not a very happy person, needs a warm beverage (milk in her case, tea in mine) to enter her system before she finally smiles and stretches and really wakes up. This morning though, she woke up and instead of wailing or crying for mommy, she stretched, was all fresh and when she saw me enter the room, she said:

N: Mamma, when I was sleeping at night, you forgot to help me wear a full pant and a full shirt.

Me (surprised): Oh...did you feel cold at night N?

N: Yes. And you forgot my jacket also.

Me: Sorry bebu.

N: Ok...when it is night again, you help me wear full pant and full shirt ok?

Me: Yes my baby.

Thinking: No wonder I saw her sit up sometime late at night, pull the blanket on top of her and go back to sleep at night. Which is very very unlike my daughter. She is normally the one who has never liked to be under a blanket at night however cold it is. I remember she used to even wiggle out of her swaddle (when she was less than a month old) that most other babies seemed to enjoy when they were infants. Note to self : She has been running a cold since Friday though. Maybe that's why.

A very good morning to you all as well...

Happy Monday everyone! And a very good morning to all.

Not sure why but I feel like I have suddenly woken up from a long slumber. Somehow, it feels like the last week kind of whizzed past by and I was too tired or sleepy or just not in the mood to notice. So much has been going on in life lately that I haven't even had the time or motivation to blog about any of it. But somehow this morning, I feel energized and refreshed again. No real rhyme or reason...maybe just maybe its coz it is the last day of my monthly visitor Aunty Flo :-)

Anyways...hope everyone had a nice Diwali break. I, for one, enjoyed two back to back long weekends at work. We had a Monday (Nov 1) and the same Friday (Nov 5) as holidays so just a 3 day week at work was a nice change. We decided to capitalize on this and booked a trip to Goa for Oct 30 - Nov 1. Left Bangalore by bus on the night of Oct 29, reached Goa the next morning and checked into the Kenilworth resort we had booked. And believe me, after that, we did really NOTHING for the next 4 days. Just relaxed, ate, enjoyed the beach and the pool to our heart's content. Bliss. Pure bliss. Really a much needed break just as a cozy family of 3 after a long long while. Vacations are a very nice time to bond emotionally and rediscover the joys of having each other and counting our blessings. I am glad we took that break.

Post that we just took it easy during Diwali. Had planned to travel again to visit my parents but were honestly too tired after the long road trip to Goa. Infact since the bus ride took too long due to bad roads, we took a one way cab from Goa back to Bangalore and cancelled our return bus tickets. That was a wiser decision and on hindsight - should have done that to and fro right from the start. Oh well...lesson learnt. So Diwali was spent by me making some besan laddus at home and generally doing rangolis, diyas and socializing with some friends - that's all. No fireworks for us since we are not crazy about them and neither is li'l N. She infact is terrified of going anywhere near them. We took her down for a walk in our apartment complex on Diwali night and she hated the noise of these bombs and ladis and cried to go back home. So we did what we usually do every year at Diwali - sat in our balcony and enjoyed the view of fireworks in the Bangalore skyline. We are lucky to have a very good view of the city from our own home so Diwali nights from our balcony are pretty nice.

Me and my hubby were talking on our way back from Goa about how he has noticed that after most of our vacations, we have some life changing events at home. Our last trip was to Sirsi, Ankola and hubby's native for li'l N's mundan and dear hubby had quit his job right after that. This time too there are some huge changes going on at my work as well as his. And we spent a good chunk of time discussing these during our drive home. So that is the other reason I have been preoccupied and away from blogging too much. To give you a summary - the company I work for is getting acquired by another MNC which means that I may not have the same job anymore. Infact, if I don't find anything else within this MNC, I may have to look outside in the next 6 months or so. And I wasn't too happy about the idea of polishing my interview shoes all over again :-( I just don't do too well with change when it is not what I have chosen generally so I was quite mad at losing the great job I had. I mean it had a very good amount of flexibility which was the only reason I could even think of working with a little child at home. And it matched my past experience and career desire perfectly. It was in many ways tailor made for me. It will be next to impossible to find another one like this in today's market. I will be forced to change my career and lose the flexibility a little which I really don't wish to at this point. Oh well...enough negativity right? Let's wait and see...and hope for the best. Like I said - this morning I am all fresh and energized full of positivity again. Hubby too got a new boss at work and there are major re-orgs happening that may not be received too well by everyone. But he too is dealing well with it and making the most out of it.

On a brighter note, I had planned to invite some upper management guests from work over for Diwali. And I have been stressing about that for weeks. But finally made it happen last night and thankfully it was a success (atleast in my mind :-)). No more nerve wrecking moments wondering what to cook and how to place everyone and what to buy etc. Whew! We did have a good time and some great discussions. Some things that were said and that stayed with me:

• On the topic of when to pursue entrepreneurship if that is what you really want to do - one thing he said was - do not give yourself artificial deadlines such as when I am x years of age I will do something of my own etc. Infact, if you have something in mind, the earlier you start, the better it is because you have lesser to lose. And the later you start, not only will your responsibilities increase in life but your lifestyle will only go up. It will never go down. So your expenses and stuff will only increase and it will be harder to maintain your lifestyle at that point.

• On the topic of buying a home and what kind, where etc. - one thing she said was - when your kids are young, your priorities are very different. What you want at that stage is not an independent villa in a far off location. Infact you want everything at your fingertips - proximity to the medical stores, doctors, super markets, shops, a good community, etc. along with security of a gated complex, amenities that the kids could use such as children's park, pool, tennis court, etc. Once they are older, one can think of building or living in your dream house far away from the city but when the kids are growing is when you really need the support system.

So all in all some eventful few weeks have gone by and hopefully this post brings me out of my so-called stressful misery and motivates me to just look at the brighter side of things. I resolve to stop taking out my stress on my loved ones at home and making them miserable as well. I will just enjoy my present and let God and nature decide what future holds for us all. Now let's just hope I stick to this resolution for atleast a week ;-)

School Season Again

It is school season again in this part of the world. And parents like me who have kids going to playschools or Montessoris are in the market for the next school their child should go to. Which means any parent I talk to, this is the topic of prime concern and one that we dwell on. Sometimes it feels like I just need something to obsess about in life - it is one thing to the other. Currently it is schools and what method of education is best for my child. Our hubbys' may call us 'paranoid moms' but trust me - all this 'market research' (translate: talking to every parent about it until they are ready to walk off the place) has helped me come to one decision atleast. That we will NOT be targeting schools which have a pure academic bend and focus only on marks rather than an all round development of the child respecting his interests in life. Which means we are taking the bold step of leaving out NPS (the most sought after school in most parent's list on our side of the town) from our list of schools we will apply to. Which is a HUGE step for a person like me who basically finds it so hard to make decisions (you can blame my Gemini genes I guess). My strategy in life otherwise is to shoot in all directions (translate: apply to all schools where the child will be eligible for age-wise) and once you do have a few admissions, think hard (translate: chew my hubby's and others' brains harder) and research a lot more (translate: read and re-read all the same websites and online forums and reviews again) and then make a call. Sigh!

So like I was saying - we have made a decision to leave out NPS from our list. But knowing me, I know the moment I hear that they are issuing forms, you will find me standing (and sweating like a pig) in the loooooooooong queues outside not 1, not 2 but all 3 branches of NPS near our area really hoping that I get the form! That's me. I know myself very well that way. Hubby calls it madness but so be it - I don't want to be left out of the collective madness (afterall the tonnes of other folks standing in line cannot be all mad). And what if my child does not get through allllllllllllllll the other schools we will be trying for and what if this is the only one left? Hubby says in that case we let her continue at the lovely Montessori she is going to now and try again for LKG next year. No big deal. And I actually agree. She and us parents loooooooooooove this Montessori she is going to at present and breaks my heart to have to pull her out of it in 1 year since she is not only enjoying it but learning so much there without any input from our end! She is just 3 and is already recognizing so many alphabets and numbers and is even writing some of them at times. Amazing really. But the sad thing is I don't have the courage to let her continue there and only worry about admissions when she is ready to go into 1st std. I wish I really had that courage and determination coz she has everything she needs here including daycare facilities (if needed). But I know I will feel like I didn't give it a shot for her long term schooling if I do not apply to some of them this year.

Ok so back to the research on big schools. Here is other thing I get put off in schools these days. It is what they call new-age methodologies of teaching which include multimedia enabled classrooms, computer labs with educational games/CDs and such! I mean really? For 4 year olds? I could have popped a DVD at home and have her watch it if that is what teaching is about these days! I mean I would rather have her spend her time outdoors interacting and learning with other kids (even if it is free play) than watch DVDs in a classroom.

So like I said, school fever begins again. And starting next month, you can find me standing in one of those queues at most of them schools in and around our area (even further beyond our area I'm sure)! So here's wishing myself (and my child) some luck and sending luck to all you parents out there who are in the same boat as me this year! Do keep me posted on which schools are you targeting and which you are NOT (in and around Koramangala, Bangalore).

Happy 3rd Bday My Child

My little baby turned 3 last week. Unlike the past 2 birthdays where we had a huge bash with all friends and family in town, we decided to keep it very cozy and close knit only with immediate family this time around. We wanted to take full advantage of the fact that now that we are in the same country, we can actually share such events with parents and let them have the joy of seeing their little ones grow too. So we booked a trip to Bombay and took a week off from work just so we can be with family.

We enjoyed seeing N bonding with her dada-dadi-bua, nana-nani and even took time out to visit my brother in Pune so that she could see her mama-mami and some of our cousins in Bombay and Pune. Overall nice quality time with family was spent and new memories of the child's 3rd bday were created. Her day started with a visit to the Ganpati temple with her mom-dad-dada-dadi and then cake cutting in the evening. Later we took her to McDonalds for dinner so that she could hog on fries and ketchup to her heart's content!

Got back yesterday and each of us had withdrawal symptoms of getting back to our usual grind this morning :-) The little one kept saying "I don't want to go to school" and "Mamma don't go to office" until she asked what was in her dabba. When I mentioned apples, she asked for cake. And when I actually agreed, she was overjoyed. She was thrilled at going to school with cake in her snack box and actually got ready in a jiffy. She surprised me by even saying her prayers without being prompted to (which is a never before activity btw). I have been saying the Gayatri Mantra with her each morning while starting our drive to school and she helps me finish it. Today she said the whole thing (obviously in her cute childish language) all by herself and pranced around to go to school. But then at the school gate, she actually had tears in her eyes when I dropped her there. I am sure she'll be fine in a few days time as she meets her friends that she has missed over the last 9 days. Already last night was a blast when she just refused to be separated from her best friend A and insisted we go out to dinner with them as well! So a nice Italian dinner was had - courtesy her friend A and our child N who refused to be separated on meeting each other after 9 long days! Another milestone of sorts was had last night when she actually kept her promise of not sucking her thumb if we took her out with her friend A with whom she so wanted to go to the restaurant. She surprisingly did not suck her thumb throughout dinner even though she got sleepy and tired by the end and kept saying "I want to go home and sleep" coz she knew she had promised not to suck her thumb at the restaurant. Even at bed time we insisted a little and she kept the promise well. I am proud of her for keeping her promise this time although it was very difficult for her.

May she grow to make herself and us prouder of her each day...each year...forever. Love you to bits my little one.

A guest post I'd written recently...

As part of Vishy's attempt to capture various perspectives on "Returning to India".

http://ulaar.wordpress.com/2010/08/04/the-journey-from-one-home-to-another-guest-post/

You can keep going back to find more such stories by clicking on his newly launched category "R2IProfiles" on the right (or you can just go here).

Give it a read and let me know what you think...

New Gen Kids

Kids say the funniest things. Listen to a conversation between 2 three-year-olds in our apartment complex. Let me quickly give you the context. The center of this incident is the little girl S (she is 3 years old) whose parents are friends of ours and who, like us, have moved back from the US a couple of years ago. S's daddy has traveled to the US for work a few times since moving back to India.

S (to her mom) : I want that stroller that baby A has (referring to a toy stroller with lights on the wheels)

Mom: I don't know where you get it S. Ask your friend A where she got it.

S (toA): Where did you get this baby stroller with lights?

A: I think Poona.

S (looking very disappointed): Oh. Do you get this in America?

A: I don't know, you may get it. Why?

S: No...if you get it in America, my daddy can buy it for me. Poona...I don't know.

ROFL!!! I was so amazed and amused at the same time when S's mom narrated this to me! See how our kids are turning out? To them, US seems more approachable from Bangalore than Poona :-)

Poll Time

Ok people - please provide me your honest opinions on this childcare issue that has been a lot on my mind lately. For a 2 yr 9 month old toddler who is not too fond of leaving mommy all day long and is generally a shy personality in public (a naughty brat at home or amongst close friends though), what would you personally prefer as a childcare arrangement while mommy is away at work:

• Daycare?
• Maid at Home?
• Combination of Both?
• Not Sure

Please use the poll I have created on the right navigation bar here and send me your detailed thought process behind your vote in the comments section if possible. I have had lot of issues finding the right maid for my little girl and have gone through atleast 6 of them in the last 6 months. Each had their pros and cons and I have even tried daycare which has its pros and cons too. But am unable to make up my mind on what I prefer more - her comfort of being in her own home with a maid I may or may not trust or her discomfort of being outside of her familiar surroundings at a day care but with caregivers I may grow to trust. Get the picture? I think most of you working moms go through this and figure out what works for your family the best. I am trying to work it out at present with a lot of different options that I have either tried already or want to try without upsetting her too much. Sigh...the dilemma!

Moving On to the New Year

Just a random post to pour out all that I have been feeling lately...

• Ever since I got back home to Bangalore after a month long trip from my brother's wedding, things seem quite changed with most of my friends in town. Seems like everyone has moved on to pursue things in life that they always wanted to. Its all for their good ofcourse but it just seems like so much has hapenned in the one month I was away. One of my friends & neighbor bought a new home (which ofcourse means she will be moving away soon), two of my friends got pregnant with a second one (and sadly both of them lost the babies too), one of them got out and got a job (which means she is less available during the day) and another one is looking to pursue some kind of an educational course to get back to work. This gave me lots of inspiration and the push I needed to get out in the job market myself. Just seems like all of us who have been at home during the transitional period to settle down in Bangalore have now decided to move on.
• So I started 2010 with a resolution that this is the year I will take the next big step in my life - either have a second kid or buy a home for ourselves or get back to my career that I gave up almost a year ago (since we moved back from the US). So that is my resolution - to move on to the next step in life and get all the support structure needed around me to support this move.
• Hence I am currently in the market for a full time cook cum nanny for my kiddo. Just like I had in the US. And I tell you it is hard...very hard to find someone you can trust your child and your home to. I am trying out different maids almost every other day. I am also evaluating day-cares as another option but am a little hesitant sending little N to one at this stage. Knowing her, we as parents believe she will be most comfortable at her own home. I really hope and pray I find someone as trustworthy as I had in the US. How I wish I could call that nanny over to India and have her live with us! If you don't know who I am talking about, see here and here.
• My plan is to settle little N down with either a nanny or a day-care and get back to work in the next month or so. Any tips or ideas anyone? How have you stepped out of home with a little one around? I mean I had gone back to work right after she turned 3 months but that was in the US and that too once I found a nanny I could trust. I think it is easier to trust someone there than in India coz of the laws and traceability system there. The quality of maids I am finding here is not comparable to what I had there and the Montessori schools I like do not have on-campus day-cares here. So what did you mommies who moved back to India do? What if I get a job I really like but it requires some travel? And worse - what if they require travel abroad (even if it is once or twice a year)? What do you guys do then?

Before Amnesia Sets In - Part 2

I had written a post earlier on a few of the most frequently asked questions regarding baby care. Wanted to continue with the same thought process before I forget all these precious minute details again.

Weaning off the Bottle

I wanted to pen down one of the biggest accomplishments me and my little brat have made recently. We had been away to my in-laws and then my parents place over the last month for my bro's wedding. So I took this opportunity to turn my gradual bottle weaning process into an accelerated one coz anyways my target was to wean her off the bottle completely before the wedding. And although it was tough initially seeing the poor baby ask for the bottle time and again and being cranky without it, I am proud to announce that she has finally changed her ways and has been successfully weaned off the Dr. Brown's bottles! Whew!

I must say though that in many ways I was actually happy with her milk intake through the bottle. She drank more than 3 bottles at times (6-7 ounces each). Now with a cup, it has come down to one good full cup in a day and maybe a sip or two here and there. Quite a drastic drop from what she used to take earlier. I am trying though to make it up with other calcium rich foods like cheese, yogurt, milk in her cereal etc. And I do see that she is eating better now that her tummy does not get full with milk alone. But the eating part could just be coz she is growing up and needs more anyway. Oh well...us moms can't stop worrying about what kiddos eat I guess. But atleast this is one big milestone that little N has finally accomplished after me really wondering if she's gonna continue with the bottles forever :-)

So here's how we did it. I tried the gradual process for a month or so before I left town. Used to give her milk from a cup at nights and got her used to falling asleep without a bottle in the bed. Once she got a little used to that process, I stopped bottles during the day as well. The only one she got was when she woke up in the morning and sometimes after her afternoon nap as well. Coz for the longest time she needed that as a comfort factor and as a tummy filler to wake up happy. If she didn't get that she would be really cranky and would not stop sucking on her thumb. So when she was fully awake, she had no issues drinking from a straw cup or a normal cup. There were many a nights when she did not drink enough from a cup and so did not sleep well (which obviously meant mommy and daddy did not sleep well either). But I did not give into a bottle feed at night to make sure she gets the message that she should drink sufficiently from the cup before turning in at night so that she does not get hungry at night again. In any case, one fine day when she had finished her evening bottle on the couch, she was fiddling with it and turned the nipple upside down and said "oh it broke". I grabbed this opportunity with both hands and emphasized again and again how she broke the bottle and how she cannot have milk in the bottle anymore. This logic worked for all her day and night milk intake except for the first bottle in the morning. And I was not in ready to take on that battle yet so quietly sneaked it into her while her eyes were closed anyways. The day we were leaving Bangalore though (Nov. 18th) she opened her eyes during the early morning feed and said "the bottle is fixed now!". And I was shocked! My hubby said its time we take this morning bottle away too. So travelling to Bombay was the best opportunity to do that. Once there, I told her the bottle was broken and so we left it at our Bangalore home. She did not like it a bit and cried for it for 2 days. I just did not give in and dealt with a mostly cranky child there. The 3rd day we went to meet one of my friends who has 2 kids, the younger of whom (baby A) was a year old and obviously drank from a bottle. My little N saw that baby drink from exactly the same Dr. Brown bottle and said "I want bottle se duddu". It ached my heart to see her yearn for it like that. So when we got home, I gave in and let her have her bottle again. You should have seen the happiness in that poor child. She was so thrilled after she had her heart's content. But I was again in a fix as to how to tell her it was a one time thing. So we told her that was baby A's bottle and after you had it, we returned it to baby A. Somehow she bought this story and was ok not having a bottle after that again. She cutely kept repeating "A is a chhota baby na, that's why she has bottle se duddu. I am a big girl so I am not sucking bot and saying bottle se duddu" (bot = thumb in konkani). Awww...what a samajhdar little kiddo.

We left for my parents place the next day and changing towns really helped. I could tell her how we left baby A behind and how it was her bottle. So now N will have cup se duddu. And I had to distract her with lots of stories, books, Dora on TV or watching kids play in the building's lobby - even late at nights before bed. But all that hard work paid off and little N finally took to drinking from a cup. So the last bottle she had was on Nov. 20 when she was almost 2 years and 3 months. Whew! I must say making them drink milk from a cup is more labor for us moms. And inspite of all that hardwork on our part, they don't drink as much as they used to anyway. So I really wonder whether it is worth all the hassle. I mean I had relatives visiting us during the wedding who said our kids had bottles till they were 5 years old. They didn't see it is a big deal that a 2 year old was still taken to a bottle. Infact they told me I weaned her off quite early. Now I am not sure if the tried and tested old ways are correct of the pediatrician's warnings of bottles being unhygienic as they have more crevices to clean. Oh well...whatever it is...I have seen it is easier to change habits sooner than later. So having to do this when she was 4 or 5 would have been far tougher I think.

My next project with her now is teaching her how to eat her meals by herself and getting her out of the thumb sucking habit. Efforts are still on and I will surely do a post once we achieve complete success. So stay tuned :-)

Potty Training

I wrote a post earlier on how we started little N's potty training at 18 months and were mostly done in a month or so. For details, please go to the post here and read from 4th paragraph onwards - "the other milestone I had planned for her at this age was to start her potty training...."

Settling down in her First School

Again, just creating a list of all these milestones here for a quick reference. I had written about how we got her to settle down in her first school ever and learn to stay away from mommy/daddy for a bit. That is always a worry for parents and by the time we get around to doing it again for the second kiddo, we tend to forget the details of how the first one did it. So read the post about it here.

Of school admissions and such

Wow what a morning we had - me and my child - I tell ya! Totally filmy. Started with me learning last night that one of the popular schools in our area (NPS) is giving out admission forms for Montessori and LKG starting today. And as you've read in my previous post how I've learnt that you really have to know where you want to send your child even before h/she turns 2 so that you can start the entire process in time. Gosh - little did I know what's in store for me this morning.

So first of all, some background on my rationale here. I was always of the opinion that I am not too crazy about these bigger schools yet coz my daughter is really too little right now. And even in June of next year she'll only just be 2 yrs 9 months. So still a little early for me to start worrying about her admission to LKG. The only reason I would even think of applying to big schools like NPS would be coz they have a Montessori stream of education where they take kids who turn 3 in June (give or take a few months). This way the kid gets a Montessori education and automatically goes to the 1st grade from there. So not only does the kid get the full benefit of the Montessori system for 3 years but the double benefit is that the parents do not have to worry about admissions to a bigger school again after their Montessori education is up. That was going to be the only reason that would make me even turn my head towards big schools like NPS. But again, in my mind, the school had to be very close to where we live and it had to have a warm and fuzzy feel for my kid. So when I came across the NPS HSR website last night and saw they were giving out forms starting today, I called one of my other friends who is also in the same boat as me. We both decided to drop our little ones to their playschool the next morning and then co-ordinate collecting forms from the 2 schools - NPS HSR and NPS Koramangala. Sounds simple so far right? Little did I know how huge a deal it would be for everyone that there would be a queue for miles and miles for such things. I had decided that I'll not get worked up like other parents, and coolly walk into one school and stand in line. If I get the form till 11:30 great, if not, I will leave the line, pick up N from school at 12:15, come home and try the next day. That was my plan since the start.

But reality had something else in store for me. Here's what transpired this morning. After an early start in the morning and several co-ordinating phone calls later I learn that my friend's dad has already gone to NPS HSR to collect forms for her daughter T. So reshuffling of plans hapenned amidst all the craziness of getting the little ones ready for school. I finally got out of the house, dropped N to school at 9:45am and co-ordinated with this other friend A who offered to give me a ride to the school. Reached NPS HSR at 10 and almost fell off my feet on seeing how long the queue was!!! I was almost ready to turn around and leave coz there was no way I would get even near the school gate till 11:30. And they were only giving out forms from 9-11am according to their website. Yet I tentatively dragged my feet towards the end of the spiral never ending queue and asked the lady at the tail end of the queue if this was the line for admission forms. As she turns her head towards me we both exclaim! She turns out to be my classmate from school (we'll call her S) whom I haven't met since I left school 15 years ago! Now isn't that really just like out of the movies! I said to her if this was one of my ex-boyfriends I would be meeting like this, it would be really really filmi! :-D Oh well...so we start excitedly catching up on every little detail...which hugely helped the 2 hours go by much sooner than it seemed. All the while we just couldn't get over the way met. Turns out she does not live too far from our place and has bought a new place even closer to ours now. I again digress. Back to the 'eventful morning details'. So I have most of my neighbors/friends calling me to give me real-time updates from the queue at the other school (NPS Koramangala) and such almost every 15 minutes. When the clock struck 11:30, we were in a panic mode coz we weren't too far away from the office in the queue but weren't so close that we can get the form and leave in the next 5 minutes to pick up our kids. We kept staring at the clock and at the queue. Finally both S and I made a call and asked our friends to pick up our kids from playschool. Now I've never done this before and I could not stop imagining N's little face wrinkled up in tears on not seeing mommy after school. I have seen it happen to other kids when their mommies were running late and felt terrible for that one minute of panic and sorrow the little ones find themselves in. But this call had to be made coz just the next 5-10 minutes of patience would get us those much coveted forms or else we'd have to repeat this all over again the next day for the same school and the day after for the other branch (NPS Koramangala). My friends convinced me saying she will be not be in strangers' hands...atleast she is with friends whom she knows pretty well. So she will get over it pretty quickly and will be fine if they put on Dora and prop her in front of the TV. And I would be with her in a matter of minutes anyways. S even said that there is always a first time like this...they'll have to learn to survive such things or else we'll never be able to go back to work! I kind of agreed with this thinking but obviously us moms are always full of guilt. So it killed me to stand there...but I did. I finally grabbed the form at 12:15, rushed out with S and reached home by 12:30. Went to my neighbor's to pick up N and found her in the lap of neighbor's kiddo's grandmom propped in front of Dora playing on TV but crying away saying "Let's go home!" It melted my heart and somehow convinced me that this little baby of mine is definitely not ready to go to a huge school like NPS yet. I will be sending her to one of the warm and fuzzy Montessoris nearby until she is a year or two older. Gosh! The only saving grace out of all this was that this nice friend/neighbor was able to somehow manage getting an extra form for me from NPS Koramangala as she was standing in that line this morning...thus saving me from doing this all over again tomorrow. Huge thanks G. And A and S and all of my other girlfriends who came up and offered me some much needed support without me even having to ask for it today. Such times really make me wonder - what would a girl do without such wonderful girlfriends!

Anyway, after N saw me she couldn't stop telling me to take her home. So I hugged her tight and brought her home. We cuddled on our couch and surprisingly she started telling me between her sobs how she saw Dora and Tiko and Isa and Swiper the Fox at T's house! Gosh and I thought all she did was cry out there :-) Then she asked to see Dora on her 'own' TV which I promptly obeyed. There we sat hugging each other tightly for a while and watching Dora thanking God for simple pleasures. I tried getting up to get some water for the child but she pulled me back saying "No...don't go". I was holding back tears on seeing how shaken up she was. After 5-10 minutes of cuddling, she had a bottle of milk and like a peaceful baby fell asleep cozily in my arms. I love you my little child and I am soooo not ready for you to get lost in a huge school yet.

The irony of this while episode is that I was the mom who used to crib in the US saying how everyone rushes to send their kids to school at such a young age in India...and that I'll never fall prey to that madness. And here I was this morning doing the exact same thing! Yes...I can always justify it was solely for the Montessori and what not...but part of me still knows that in the end it is a big school and she will not get the one on one attention she might get in a small or mid-size preschool. But knowing me, I am positive I will still end up filling the form and dropping it off anyway. If she does end up getting accepted, that will be another debate with self...and I don't want to even think about it right now. Will cross that bridge when I come to it. But tell me folks...isn't this falling prey to the exact system I did not want to get into in the first place? What would you have done? Would you have stuck to a mid-size Montessori and gone through this entire madness for getting admissions in the 1st grade? Or would you tackle it all right now and not have to worry about their admission process again in 2-3 years? I personally was always inclined towards not having children go through unnecessary stress so early in their lives. But still can't fail to wonder how I had almost started falling prey to this madness myself! Views? Opinions?

Happy Second Birthday My Child

Dear Little N,

You turned 2 almost a month ago now and I've been meaning to write you this huge milestone letter since then but you have been so busy at keeping me busy that I hardly found time to pen down all the stuff you've been up to :-) But I guess that's how toddlerhood is supposed to be. And trust me I am loving every moment of seeing you grow up so big so soon! Its like all of a sudden you've found soooooo many words that you are able to join them all in various languages to express everything you want to say! I mean to me it sure sounds like you are suddenly talking like a grown up coz it took you longer than most kids to start talking in the first place given that you poor little baby were exposed to 4 different languages since you were born. So ofcourse you took your own time to process it all and then finally picked your preference which interestingly was niether your papa's or your mom's mothertongue - it was a third medium altogether - English. What were we thinking right ;) Its almost like you went to school and suddenly within 3 months picked up a whole new language along with all its grammar and everything. You amaze us when you construct complete sentences such as "Ant coming to take my chhota ball" or "Want to play ball" or "N... fell down from bed here" and millions of other such things. The cutest part is you don't yet use the words "here" or "there". So when you want to say these words in a sentence, you point to the place and make a sound aaaiiinn (can't quite figure out how to spell it but it sounds like hain).

Other than talking up a storm, you also know your numbers (1 - 10), alphabet (A-Z) and your colors so well! I mean you are just 2 years old for godssake and just until a few days ago everytime you counted anything, you said "8,10". And now you rattle off "1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10"! Even with colors, I was shocked one day when you started opening your box of pencil colors and took out each one telling me what color it was. I mean until just the day before that, you kept just guessing the colors without really looking at the object or knowing which is which. And then suddenly it probably clicked in that cute little head of yours and you started telling me "this crayon is pink", "this is red", etc. Such thrills I tell ya! You love singing your ABCs in the nursery rhyme form and your numbers in the poem 1,2 buckle my shoe.

You have such a huge collection of songs you keep singing these days too. Some of your favorites are "lakdi ki kathi", "itsy bitsy spider", "who made the twinkling stars", "row row row your boat", "om shanti shanti (prayer at school)", "oh isn't it fun to walk in the sun", "teddy bear teddy bear", "johnny works with one hammer" and sooooo many more. Most of these you hear at school and some from our laptop at home (courtesy youtube.com). Best is these days when we play any nursery rhymes DVD, you look at the kids do dances and imitate the steps. Like the Boogie Woogie song, you look so cute dancing along with the babies on TV trying to put your left leg in and shaking it all around!

Oh and how can I forget - your favorite show on TV these days is DORA! Ofcourse it isn't telecasted here in India so we have ripped quite a few Dora DVDs from friends and that is ALL you want to see on TV these days. This craze started a few months ago and has only gotten more intense each passing day. Earlier you always had your breakfast cereal with Dora on TV but lately you want most of your meals propped in front of Dora. Earlier you just watched Dora without batting an eyelid. Nowadays, you actually get down of the sofa and start dancing at songs especially the "We did it" song! Its sooo cute to watch you so thrilled by a character like this that we even dedicated your second birthday party to your favorite character. Yes - I arranged a Dora themed party for your second birthday inspite of not finding a lot of Dora stuff in the markets here. Here's what we did for the Dora theme:

My friend B and I hand made the party invitation cards with all the scrapbooking material I had at home. We spent a lot of time and effort on the invitation cards and the envelopes. It turned out to be a pretty neat looking Dora themed pull out card with ribbons on the envelopes, eyelets for a pullout ribbon and all that jazz. We were so inspired by our own creations that we decided to launch a home based business making greeting cards exclusively! :-) Here's a pic to show you how they looked:

For decorations, I had a friend who bought me huge Dora and Boots rubber stickers which we put on the walls in the party hall. Other than that, we did crape ribbon and other decorations in the Dora color scheme of purple, pink and orange. Thankfully we had a lot of decoration stuff left over from her last bday party in the US. And they were all color co-ordinated too. So it was great to be able to reuse all of that. Another friend gave me a nice Dora and Boots Happy Bday banner and a Dora bedsheet that we used as her cake table-cloth. So it all came together pretty well inspite of me being new to Bangalore and not finding a lot of Dora stuff in the market.

Luckily, I found Dora eye-glasses for the kids to wear other than the party hats and the blowers ofcourse. I also found Dora forks and spoons just enough to serve with the cake. We catered food from Saraswati Sweets and the menu was dhokla, poori, aalu bhaji and jalebi. Other than that, we had lots of snacks like cookies, finger rings, muffins, etc. for everyone - kids and adults.

For games, our main attraction was an automatic bubble blower machine. We just kept it near the entrance and it blew bubbles that just thrilled the kids to no end. After a while though, the floor got so slippery that we had to shut it off. Other than that, I'd researched a lot for Dora themed games and had planned quite a few but time limitations allowed us to play only 2. So for the first one, I had printed out a lot of Dora activity and coloring pages from the Nick Jr. website. Gave all the kids 2-3 sheets each with tonnes of crayons I had bought to be used. They had fun getting creative and showing off their coloring skill. The next was a fishing game in which I filled a tub with water and used around 10 bath floating toys as the fish in the pond. The kids were then given strainers (chai chhannis) and asked to "fish" the toys out one by one. This one was a huge hit and none of the kids wanted to stop doing it at all!

The cake was the part I was most skeptical about but Sweet Chariot did a great job with their computer printed Dora cake. We loved the looks and the yummy taste (Butterscotch). And the most important part of the party - the return gifts. No kid can leave a party without their surprise filled goody bags. I used cute paper bags (again left over from N's first bday party) pink for the girls and green for the boys. Luckily I had found Dora stickers at Oddessey and used them to decorate each goody bag. For the gifts, I had found magic sketch books at the same store which I gift wrapped and threw in lots of stickers and tattoes of various kind and candies in each bag. Parents loved the idea of a magic sketch book coz it is absolutely something non messy and you can hand it to the kids and let them be busy at it for hours. Basically the pages in the book seem blank when you look at them until you rub a pencil on it. That's when the picture appears in the form of a sketch. Pretty neat huh :-)

Here are some pics so you can visualize all that I described:

Gosh - where did I start this long wound post and look where I ended up! Sorry dear N, I got carried away with all the joy of you turning two and mommy getting a chance to express her creative side somewhere! I can never thank you enough for giving us so much joy in life little N. I never really knew what I missed in life until I had you. God bless you and all the other kids in this world with all the joys, happiness and love they so deserve.

Side Note - me and my friend B have decided to commercialize this interest of ours and will be glad to be of service if you ever need an event organized in a particular theme. Just let us know when and where and we can take care of the rest. Now with all the research done and all the material bought, we are quite enjoying this and are getting better at it.

Schools in and around Koramangala, Bangalore

So after all the madness of searching a good Pre-school or Daycare for little N ended a few months ago, its hard to believe that it is already time to worry about where should she go next year onwards. I mean I just got her admitted to a pre-school in June and it is just now that she is actually enjoying it and learning lots from it. And already, it is barely 2 months and I have to worry about where she should go next year!!? The session next year does not even start until June 2010 but the reason we parents need to plan now is that most big schools will release admission forms in September or so (after Dussehra holidays) and you need to grab it asap to apply and be considered on a first come first served basis. Amazing na?

So as we did earlier during our pre-school research, me and my friends aka paranoid moms ;-) started our rounds of visiting schools in and around our area. Here's what we've found so far. I will continue this post in its part 2 as and when I visit more schools in the vicinity.

1). NPS Koramangala: They have both - the Montessori and the Traditional streams of education for junior school. To get admitted into Montessori 1 (first year), the child has to be 3 years of age by June of the academic year for which admission is seeked. If that does not happen, the child cannot get admitted into the Montessori stream at all (unless in cases where they make an exception if he/she has been to a different Montessori before). Now I took this at its face value and came back thinking that since N is an August born child, she is not eligible for NPS montessori at all. But many moms in our community have now informed me that they make exceptions all the time. They themselves have seen cases where there are October/November born kids in Montessori 1. So I have been advised to atleast take the form and apply.

• Pros: If your child gets into Montessori here, he/she can enjoy 3 full years of Montessori education and then go into 1st standard right here. So they get the full benefit of Montessori way of learning and you as parents need not worry about their re-admissions to a mainstream school all over again. The school follows the CBSE curriculum from 1st standard onwards.
• Cons: From all the reviews I have heard about this school, they are very academically oriented. Exams, tests, projects, etc. such a young age is not what I would want for my child - but then every parent has a different perspective. Some believe this prepares them for reality in their lives. One more thing - we asked the front desk lady to show us around the school or let us know a date when they can conduct some kind of an orientation for prospective parents and she very nicely refused to extend any sort of a courtesy on that front. I guess this school just goes by its name - either you apply or you don't. You don't get a chance to see it during or after hours.

2). Little Feat Montessori House of Children: I have already written about this place here but that was when I had not visited them yet. I now went and took a tour of this place and they seem very friendly and understanding as a management. They take admissions atleast twice a year (Dec and June). Your child will most likely get in as long as he/she is under 2.5 years of age when you contact them. And the place, their montessori material, infrastructure is pretty good too. I have a lot of friends whose kids go here and the parents are all happy.

3). Vibgyor High (HSR) : The front desk lady here was very different from the one we met at NPS. She actually took a lot of time to show us 4 moms (with our toddlers) around the school. It is a nicely built place with a lot of facilities for the kids and the best part is - they have after school day care on the premises! So kids can spend the rest of the afternoon there if both the parents go to work. To qualify for admission here, the kid needs to be atleast 2 yrs 9 months by June of the academic year. This is when he/she will get admitted into Nursery. If they are atleast 3 yrs 9 months, they get into LKG and then UKG and so on. So according to my kiddo's birthdate, she being August born, will be 2 yrs 10 months in June 2010 and so will absolutely qualify here (unlike at NPS where she needs to be 3 yrs of age). They follow the ICSE board curriculum.

• Pros: This school claims they do not have a midterm and final exams structure until 4th standard. They do have weekly assessments to judge a child's progress and grade him accordingly. Again, some parents prefer the traditional approach to prepare their child early on. I am not in one of those camps. I would rather my child learn through experiencing things first hand than cramming and taking tests/exams. Another pro, getting admissions into this school seems relatively easier since they are brand new. This is their first functional year.
• Cons: School is quite far from Koramangala - took us 30 minutes to get there. Might be a good option if you live in Sarjapur or HSR Layout. Also, the campus was pretty much all concrete. And for folks like me who have grown up in schools which has ample ground space for sports like cricket, football, high jump, long jump, PT, etc. it did not appeal much to the eyes. Was too much concrete for my taste.

Other schools we plan to visit in the near future are:

• DPS (have heard they have a very good campus)
• Prakriya (have heard very good things about this school - their campus, curriculum, way of teaching and their nursery)
• Headstart Montessori House of Children (have heard that this Montessori also has classes upto 5th currently and they have aquired land for more)
• Bethany High (this school has also recently launched a child care center for infants and toddlers who can attend pre-school here and move on to Bethany High from there)

Do let me know if you think of other schools that I should add to my list here. If not, do keep checking for Part 2 of this post.

EDITED ON Oct. 10, 2009 TO ADD : NPS Indiranagar has started giving out admission forms and their other branches (Koramangala and HSR) might start the coming week.

Motherhood opens your eyes to so much more

I had quit my job in mid April since my 6 months of working offshore had come to a close. After this I had the entire month of May free before my little one started her first school ever in June. It had been 9 months since we moved to India and I had only seen my parents right after we arrived. So I packed us (mother and daughter) off to visit both sets of grandparents to spend some much deserved quality time with them. I had wanted hubby dear to come along too but that didn't quite work out what with his work and stuff.

So May was when I had the travel bug. Decided to make a trip to Pune and kill 2 birds with one stone - finish my business and spend a few days with my brother while I was there. I did exactly this, then flew back to Bangalore, picked up my baby and flew to Bombay the following weekend. Spent a week there with my in-laws and then went off to Vapi to my parents. Spent another week there, came back to Bombay for a couple days and then back home to Bangalore. All in all a wonderful trip was had and lots of memories were made. But what urged me to write this post today was this feeling I had topmost in my heart during the entire stay this time with our families. I suddenly felt closer to my parents than I have ever felt in years. I now understood why in all these years when I was in the US, I was treated like a guest every time we came home for a 3 week break. Ofcourse we were guests who were so detached from the day to day ongoings of our own parents...who would call them just once a week and talk about the health and weather and visit them just once a year for a coupla weeks and call it a day. Really? Is that all you get from your own children once you are done raising them all these years...staying up at nights for them...praying...worrying...thinking...breathing...practially living for them all these years? I think now that I am a mother I suddenly realize what our own parents have gone through to bring us up as the good human beings we now are. Now I understand what they mean by saying - it is much easier to give birth to a child than to raise him/her in life.

I guess my husband always knew why he was moving back to our country and he might just read this post and say - duh! But honestly, it took me a while to really get it. I mean, yes we were all moving back to be physically closer to our families and stuff but even during all that, I never thought I would have this feeling in my heart after being away from home for soooo long. I mean I guess once you are in a situation for this long, you kinda start getting used to the setup and start looking at the positive side of things - such as you have a better standard of living in the US, your independence is a huge factor that you gain as a woman, your work life balance is far better than in India. True. But the intimacy we think we still maintain with our loved ones back home by making 2 or3 calls a week, is, in my opinion, just a fantasy in our own mind.

So this time when I was leaving my parents place for coming back to my own home, I suddenly felt glad about moving back to India. I did not have tears in my eyes during the goodbyes for the first time in ages...and I somehow felt like now I am their daughter once again (instead of the once in a year visiting guest). And most of all, I felt I could do so much more for them now that I am here instead of just buying them clothes or gadgets from the US every time we visited. Those are really such superficial joys that they don't even care for anymore. What brings a twinkle in their eye now is the precious bond they now share with their granddaughter...the love she showers on them unconditionally...the joy she brings in their life by just being around. That is a gift that is truely priceless. Oh this can soooo be a Mastercard commercial:

A nice formal shirt for dad from JCPenney - 80$

A pearl necklace for mom from Macys - 200$

A new laptop for dear bro from CircuitCity - 1500$

The joy in their eyes on seeing their little granddaughter/neice - PRICELESS!

First Day at School

A new chapter of her life begins...she has grown into a school going toddler...trotting away from home...stepping into a new life one tiny step at a time. I have mixed emotions in my heart as she steps into this world out of the shelter of her cozy little home and family. She will now have to learn to fend for herself, live without her mommy and daddy for a bit and be happy knowing that they will surely come back to get me in their arms. I never thought I would be this emotional today especially since I have gone back to work when she was 3 months old, leaving her home with a very nice lady (her nanny). But then when she turned a year old, we moved from the US to Bangalore and I decided to work from home and then eventually quit working to make sure she settles down completely before I decide to take up something full time here. So today was her first attempt at trying to make it on her own in the midst of lots of other kids. Here are a few pictures from our first day at school:

Happily Walking to School

Enjoying the Swing at School

They told us that school will only be for 30 minutes (9:30 - 10:00am) today and tomorrow (Thursday, Jun 4 2009 and Friday, Jun 5 2009). It is mainly to acclimatize the kids to this new environment. Next week will be longer durations, depending on the child's comfort level. So how did she do today you ask? Well...not so good as I feared. She started crying when Mohini auntie first took her from me but quietened down soon when she started showing her around the lovely campus. That was when I slipped away. After the half hour was up, Meera brought her to me. They said she cried almost throughout...would quieten down at times, ask for me, and when she didn't see me, would cry again. Gosh I have never seen her head shake so vigorously and nodding sideways as when I took her back in my arms. She quietened down immediately...sobbing slowly but calmly. Then when she saw the 2 dogs in the house, she suddenly said "doggie" and was fine again. Then she sat in the swing, did the slides and generally played there for another hour or so. She was fine as long as mommy was there with her. Thank god atleast she didn't hate everything about the place and the day! She came back home pretty happy with herself and singing away. She even told me the auntie's names and has agreed to go back tomorrow. Let's hope she doesn't start bawling at the sight of school tomorrow (as she does when she sees we are going to the doctor's office)!

So here are the only friends she made at school today:

Her 2 friends at school - Bono and Nano (Mohini Auntie's pet dogs)

And here are the 2 great ladies who run this place Kinder Kare with so much love and care:

Mohini Auntie (N calls her Mo Auntie)

Meera Auntie

My Best Mother's Day Ever

So I left a huge chunk of my heart back in Bangalore recently when I had to travel on a business related trip and leave my baby behind. This was on the Friday just before the Mother's Day weekend. I had to be away for 2 nights and was scheduled to be back on Sunday morning which coincidentally hapenned to be Mother's Day.

Obviously, since I had never left my baby away from me overnight, I was going away with a heavy heart. But hubby and I decided to make the farewell quick and not drag it too much since she had already sensed something was up since a day before. Kids...they surely do have a sixth sense. N had started saying "Mamma tata" to me since the night before! So I went ahead and actually had this conversation with her:
Me: Where is mamma going?
N: Office
Me: What does N want from mamma's office?
N: Chocolate :-)

Who can then resist the urge to bring back tonnes of chocolates for the dear little baby who actually was such a nice girl while I was away that she did not give even one reason for daddy to complain! But the mommy in me decided its best to steer away from forming such habits (that too decided with a loaded heart). So I chose to bring her back some new toys to play with. Nice thinking huh :-)

Nyways, back to my Mother's Day story. So I do my work in Pune, spend nice quality time with my brother there and then fly back to Bangalore on Sunday morning (May 10, 2009). I make sure we wish both - my mom and my mom-in-law for their special day. But all this while, it completely slipped my mind that now I am a mom too and I too now have someone to wish me on this day when she grows a little older. Little did I know that my dear hubby and daughter have already planned a cute surprise for me back home. So I catch the Volvo from the airport to our home, walk the remaining 20 minutes dragging my luggage...making sure not to trouble my little child and hubby to get dressed, get the car out and drive - all for saving me a good walk that I am sure I need after such an appetising meal served in Kingfisher Air. Finally reach home panting and sweating in the summer heat, cursing all the stuff I carried in the backpack, promising to travel empty handed if possible next time and such. But all that exhaustion vanished when my daughter and hubby greeted me at the door with this conversation:
Hubby: N, what do you say to mamma?
N (shying away slightly but instantly announcing): I (read - aaaaaiiiiiieeeee) du du! (Meaning: I love you!)
Hubby: (with a group hug) Happy Mother's Day!

It just melted my heart! Teaching N to say "I love you" to greet me was probably the best mother's day gift I could ever get from both - my hubby and my dear daughter who has such an endearing way to say every new thing she learns. I actually really hope she doesn't outgrow this "I du du" way of saying "I love you"...coz when she does say it correctly, I will know that my baby will have suddenly grown up into a big girl!

Teaching her these 3 magic words shows me how thoughtful you are not just as a father but as a dear husband to me too. If you do read this, dear hubby, I want you to know that this mother's day was my best ever not just coz you taught her this but also coz you took such good care of her and yourself while I was away that I did not have a single reason to worry about anything at home. I love you dear hubby for being such a strong pillar of support for me...for always being by my side...for being the reason why I am so happy in my life inspite of all the ups and downs it brings us.

Here's wishing all you readers a belated Happy Mother's Day. Please do fill us in on how you spent yours or what touched you the most on this day.