Of viral infections and such...

We've had the worst few days in a while. Poor baby had to go through a new kind of viral infection in which her throat got badly inflamed and she had viral blisters under her tongue. So bad so that she could not even comprehend putting anything in her mouth due to the extreme pain she was in. Her favorite chocolates, cakes, chips, candy, soup, etc. were offered to her - not once but multiple times...and all she could do was stare at it for a bit and then fold and keep it away. My heart broke at a small child going through so much pain that she would want to eat her favorite things and ask for them but then would cry saying "chhaala" or "fever" and point to her mouth or throat and put it back. It started on Wednesday night and by Thursday afternoon when the fever refused to subside with Crocin syrup, I called the pediatrician. He advised administering 6ml of Ibugesic Plus every 8 hours for the fever and throat pain she was complaining of and wait it for a day or two before bringing her in. But by Friday, things just did not seem to be improving and with her not eating or even drinking anything, I took her to the pediatrician for an examination.

He checked and declared that no antibiotics will help as it is a viral infection. The first thing I remember him asking me is "What are you most worried about". Coz if anything, he asked me to be prepared for it to get worse before it gets better. He said to leave her alone if she does not eat or drink too much, don't force anything except offer warm liquids often (such as warm water, soup, dal, rice water, etc.) and keep administering Ibugesic Plus every 8 hours to help in her pain and fever. If needed, we can supplement with Crocin after 4 hours or so as well. But he prepared me mentally to say she will be worst when she wakes up coz her throat will be like sandpaper. She will probably have body ache, headache or eyes will hurt etc. She will lose weight and be ill for a week. Gosh my jaw dropped when I heard that there was nothing we could do to ease her pain or reduce the misery. It had to take its course. When we went home, she just got worse by evening as a new blister under her tongue that I had not seen before was really really troubling her. She could not bear the pain and cried constantly holding her mouth. Poor thing didn't know what it was and kept referring to it as "chhilka" (instead of chhala). That Friday evening was the worst as I had 2 meetings that I could not get out of and one of them was my 1:1 with the boss. When he heard me talking on the phone with her crying in my lap, he was instantly so supportive and first of all joked about it saying "Whoa! How many participants do we have on the call today" And when I explained she was ill, he sympathized and asked "Do you think we can talk"? I said we could until she let us which was long enough for us to have a meaningful conversation. So that was good. But later that night, she just got worse with the pain in her chhala. The fact that she kept complaining of the pain and wouldn't do anything but hold her mouth and cry, we applied the Smyle gel on it thinking it will help her (obviously after consulting with the ped). But that seemed to hurt her even more and she started kicking her legs and throwing her hands in pain! Gosh - I have never seen the poor child in so much pain ever! We panicked thinking why is she acting abnormal and worriedly called the doc to ask which hospital should we rush her to. But thankfully, after I made her rinse her mouth and get rid of the gel, she calmed down a little. Still didn't eat or drink but atleast stopped writhing in pain. Poor child did not sleep a wink that entire night! She just sat with me and watched Dora on TV or wanted to play or read books, etc. Whenever she saw anyone on TV or in the books eating anything, she would ask for the same thing. And when I offered it to her, she would just cry saying "fever hai" or "chhilka". Worst was when she asked for a chocolate (which in good health is the last thing she would resist) and when I gave an entire bar of Dairy Milk to her, she just opened it, started at it for a long time and then wrapped it up and gave it back to me with tears in her eyes. That was my worst moment ever when she wanted to eat stuff she loves and couldn't gather up the courage to coz of the immense pain. Even with water, she was thirsty but when given water, she could not even take a sip. Would just keep bringing the glass to her mouth and then stop. She would take me to the kitchen repeatedly that night, ask for water, and hold the glass and cry. She would not be able to lie down horizontal on the bed and sleep coz even that would aggravate her pain. So finally at 6:30am I somehow convinced her to go inside and slept sitting up holding her onto me. Thankfully she woke up a little more cheerful at around 10am and things started getting better on Saturday with her being able to eat very tiny bites of food and sip on warm water. We started giving her warm water with GluconD so that she can atleast start regaining some energy in her system. By Sunday it was thankfully much better. Thankfully Friday night was the worst of it and it didn't get any worse as we feared. Oh Thank God!!! Touchwood! It is always painful to see your child in pain but to see her heartbroken along with it coz she could not eat or drink even though she wanted to was just double the trauma for me. I remember explaining to her that night about how God gives pain to everyone in life. It is a part of life so that we learn the value of happiness and learn how to bear pain and come out stronger. I told her how mommy also had pain ("boo") when she was a little baby and how her mommy was so worried about her. The child just sat and listened amidst her tears that night but she did narrate some of it back the next morning so hopefully she did understand what I was trying to explain to her.

BTW that night also reminded me of the long sleepless nights we had when she was just born and somehow made me wonder whether I am ready to do this all over again :-) I guess I am...if not for anything, for her own sake. I would like her to have a sibling in life. Ah...maybe someday...For now, I just hope I get your share of pain and misery my child and may you never have to go through such agony again.

Oh and I just realized that I have written about another time when she had had

a viral infection but she was a lot younger then. Seems like the docs in the US and

here in India had nothing too different to advise, which is very reassuring in a

strange kind of way :-) I will post about her recent battle with bladder infection

too at some point so that I remember the details and can help other moms or kids

going through it. That was traumatic coz for the longest time, we did not have a

diagnosis of her pain so it was quite frustrating for us to see her go through the

pain without knowing whats wrong and how to treat it.